• Hi Guest!

    The costs of running this forum are covered by Sea Lion Press. If you'd like to help support the company and the forum, visit patreon.com/sealionpress

Alternate Wikibox Thread

Doles-elections.png

Basic idea is that Tsongas wins in 1992 but keeps his declining health a secret throughout his term. His resignation in early 1996 shocks the country, raises allegations of a government coverup, and sparks intense voter concern about the health of their elected officials. This focus on presidential health makes it rather ironic when the country elects 73-year-old Bob Dole a few months later, but the controversy caused by Tsongas' resignation outweighs concerns about Dole's age.

Four years later, though, the issue of presidential health hasn't gone away, and an overwhelming majority of voters don't want the 77-year-old Dole to run for a second term. With polls showing Dole's age likely to deny him a second term, he opts to step aside; rather than turning the party over to Vice President John Engler, a man he never particularly warmed up to during his presidency, he instead throws his weight behind his wife Liddy. Winning the Republican nomination rather easily and tapping a loyal family ally to serve as her running mate, Elizabeth Dole wins a narrow victory against Senator Bill Clinton in 2000 before winning re-election by a slightly larger margin against Senate Majority Leader Chris Dodd in 2004.
I can only hope this leads to swing state Louisiana
 
Syxy9HX.png

The 2020 United States presidential election was the 59th quadrennial and 60th general presidential election, held on November 3, 2020. The Republican ticket of Ohio Governor Clancy Brown and former New York City Mayor Eric Adams defeated the Democratic ticket of Illinois Senator Laura Dern and former DNC Chair James Zogby.

Incumbent President Catherine Hanaway of the Republican Party declined to run for a third consecutive term, largely due to her unpopularity. As such, the Republican nomination was freely contested by numerous candidates. Vice President Eddie Abraham was considered the frontrunner and led most polls prior to 2020. However, due to his support among party delegates, he did not prepare for a serious primary campaign and was taken aback by the well funded and organized campaign of Ohio Governor Clancy Brown. Brown, a former congressman, son and grandson of congressmen, was a nationally popular figure among voters of both major parties as well as other groups. He had previously declined to run in 2008 and 2012, and was expected to do so again in 2020. He was persuaded to run after being recruited by a coalition of businessmen collectively known as "the Juniors" (Howard Hughes III, Fred Trump Jr., Jon Huntsman Jr., John Paul Getty III), who were concerned about Abraham's ability to lead during any potential military conflicts that were on the horizon. With their backing, Brown entered the contest and was enthusiastically received as he barnstormed across the country, winning the majority of the primary elections with his oratory and firm rhetoric in favor of "peace at all costs, but victory by any means." Despite Brown's popularity, Abraham retained the support of most party delegates largely due to the president's maneuvering and Brown had to bring the fight to the convention. The Vice President won the first four ballots, but Brown took the lead on the fifth, and after offering the vice presidency to Eric Adams, the leader of the New York delegation and a major leader among black Republicans, Brown won a majority on the eleventh ballot and therefore the nomination. Coming out of the convention, Brown was the first Republican to lead a presidential poll since 2014.

In contrast to the divided Republican nomination process, the Democratic Party had a fairly uneventful primary and convention. Illinois Senator and former Cabinet Secretary Laura Dern had long been favored for the nomination. After suffering two consecutive upset losses in 2012 and 2016, Democratic voters and party officials were ready to nominate one of their most popular and able candidates. Dern cleared the primary process without strong opposition, gained the support of the unions, and focused on laying the groundwork for a national campaign. She selected as her running mate former Congressman, White House staffer, and DNC Chair James Zogby. If elected, Zogby would have been the second consecutive Lebanese-American vice president. Indeed, the Dern campaign had largely been preparing to run against Abraham and were put on the backfoot by Brown's victory at the convention. Brown's popularity across demographics gave him a major advantage and his status as an outsider separated him from the unpopularity of the current administration.

Whereas the previous two elections had been dominated by the 2010s recession, the downturn from 2012 to 2018 had finally given way to a new period of growth. Banking regulations passed by Democrats in Congress over presidential veto restored consumer faith, inflation decreased, and energy tensions were eased by increased oil distribution from the Near East as well as the completion of all remaining Phase VII Nuclear Stations. However, economic recovery was unevenly spread by region and demographics. The manufacturing and construction sectors in particular had not bounced back as much as expected, and both campaigns presented plans to spur growth.

Debate over economic projects were soon overshadowed by news that Egypt and Korea both successfully tested nuclear weapons, pushing the number of nuclear powers over a dozen and greatly increasing tensions across Asia. Korea in particular now had leverage against both of its neighbors, China and Japan, who seemed closer to war than ever before. The two great powers responded to the Korean test by test firing missiles over the Pacific Ocean, with the Chinese in the area of the Philippines and Japan near Guam. The Japanese also began naval activity near the Chinese island of Taiwan. Both sides accused the other of arming Korea. In the United States, the presidential candidates were bombarded with questions of whether they would get involved in any Asian war, whether to protect American economic interests, or to support either side, both of which had close relations with the U.S. There was also considerable controversy over rumors of American assistance to the Egyptian and Korean nuclear programs, which would not be answered until after the election. Furthermore, a question which had not been discussed seriously since the revelation of American atomic weapons decades ago returned: would the new president utilize these weapons in war and become the first to do so? Dern was firm in her commitment to peace and non-usage, while Brown maintained that all options were on the table. The public was split on the issue, and research has been inconclusive as to what degree the candidates responses impacted voters.

On Election Day, Brown won core Republican regions in the South and Southwest, and Dern won the Northeast and Plains. Although Dern won swing states such as Florida, Kentucky, and Missouri, Brown won every other swing state, including Wisconsin, California, and Oregon, as well as his home state of Ohio. He also narrowly won the traditionally Democratic states of Pennsylvania and Michigan. Dern became the first nominee of either party to win Missouri but lose the election since 1900. She also received highest raw vote total of any losing candidate in history up to that point. Fourteen states were won by either candidate by margins less than 3%, making this one of the closest elections in history. Ten states flipped their results from 2016. Brown's winning coalition relied on swinging high education middle and upper class white voters, a demographic that had been key to President Hanaway's two victories as well. Brown also won the Republican Party's traditional base of southern rural and midwestern white voters. Although Brown won the national popular vote by less than half a percent and 700,000 votes, he won 53% of the electoral vote. In such a close election, any number of factors may have been critical to the outcome. Dern supporters criticized unfavorable media coverage, while Democratic Party officials sought to blame candidate quality. The infamous "President Brown" ad of old footage of Dern praising the previous president Brown is also talked about by historians, as well as economic recovery under a Republican presidency, local concerns, and "upballot" trends from Congressional races.

Brown became the fourth consecutive governor elected president and ninth Ohioan. He was the second Ohioan governor named Brown elected president. With Brown's victory, the Republican Party won a third consecutive term in the White House, leading many to predict another era of single party domination like the 1980s for Republicans and 1990s-2000s for Democrats. However, Brown lost re-election in 2024 after becoming the first wartime president since Nelson Rockefeller.
 
Syxy9HX.png

The 2020 United States presidential election was the 59th quadrennial and 60th general presidential election, held on November 3, 2020. The Republican ticket of Ohio Governor Clancy Brown and former New York City Mayor Eric Adams defeated the Democratic ticket of Illinois Senator Laura Dern and former DNC Chair James Zogby.

Incumbent President Catherine Hanaway of the Republican Party declined to run for a third consecutive term, largely due to her unpopularity. As such, the Republican nomination was freely contested by numerous candidates. Vice President Eddie Abraham was considered the frontrunner and led most polls prior to 2020. However, due to his support among party delegates, he did not prepare for a serious primary campaign and was taken aback by the well funded and organized campaign of Ohio Governor Clancy Brown. Brown, a former congressman, son and grandson of congressmen, was a nationally popular figure among voters of both major parties as well as other groups. He had previously declined to run in 2008 and 2012, and was expected to do so again in 2020. He was persuaded to run after being recruited by a coalition of businessmen collectively known as "the Juniors" (Howard Hughes III, Fred Trump Jr., Jon Huntsman Jr., John Paul Getty III), who were concerned about Abraham's ability to lead during any potential military conflicts that were on the horizon. With their backing, Brown entered the contest and was enthusiastically received as he barnstormed across the country, winning the majority of the primary elections with his oratory and firm rhetoric in favor of "peace at all costs, but victory by any means." Despite Brown's popularity, Abraham retained the support of most party delegates largely due to the president's maneuvering and Brown had to bring the fight to the convention. The Vice President won the first four ballots, but Brown took the lead on the fifth, and after offering the vice presidency to Eric Adams, the leader of the New York delegation and a major leader among black Republicans, Brown won a majority on the eleventh ballot and therefore the nomination. Coming out of the convention, Brown was the first Republican to lead a presidential poll since 2014.

In contrast to the divided Republican nomination process, the Democratic Party had a fairly uneventful primary and convention. Illinois Senator and former Cabinet Secretary Laura Dern had long been favored for the nomination. After suffering two consecutive upset losses in 2012 and 2016, Democratic voters and party officials were ready to nominate one of their most popular and able candidates. Dern cleared the primary process without strong opposition, gained the support of the unions, and focused on laying the groundwork for a national campaign. She selected as her running mate former Congressman, White House staffer, and DNC Chair James Zogby. If elected, Zogby would have been the second consecutive Lebanese-American vice president. Indeed, the Dern campaign had largely been preparing to run against Abraham and were put on the backfoot by Brown's victory at the convention. Brown's popularity across demographics gave him a major advantage and his status as an outsider separated him from the unpopularity of the current administration.

Whereas the previous two elections had been dominated by the 2010s recession, the downturn from 2012 to 2018 had finally given way to a new period of growth. Banking regulations passed by Democrats in Congress over presidential veto restored consumer faith, inflation decreased, and energy tensions were eased by increased oil distribution from the Near East as well as the completion of all remaining Phase VII Nuclear Stations. However, economic recovery was unevenly spread by region and demographics. The manufacturing and construction sectors in particular had not bounced back as much as expected, and both campaigns presented plans to spur growth.

Debate over economic projects were soon overshadowed by news that Egypt and Korea both successfully tested nuclear weapons, pushing the number of nuclear powers over a dozen and greatly increasing tensions across Asia. Korea in particular now had leverage against both of its neighbors, China and Japan, who seemed closer to war than ever before. The two great powers responded to the Korean test by test firing missiles over the Pacific Ocean, with the Chinese in the area of the Philippines and Japan near Guam. The Japanese also began naval activity near the Chinese island of Taiwan. Both sides accused the other of arming Korea. In the United States, the presidential candidates were bombarded with questions of whether they would get involved in any Asian war, whether to protect American economic interests, or to support either side, both of which had close relations with the U.S. There was also considerable controversy over rumors of American assistance to the Egyptian and Korean nuclear programs, which would not be answered until after the election. Furthermore, a question which had not been discussed seriously since the revelation of American atomic weapons decades ago returned: would the new president utilize these weapons in war and become the first to do so? Dern was firm in her commitment to peace and non-usage, while Brown maintained that all options were on the table. The public was split on the issue, and research has been inconclusive as to what degree the candidates responses impacted voters.

On Election Day, Brown won core Republican regions in the South and Southwest, and Dern won the Northeast and Plains. Although Dern won swing states such as Florida, Kentucky, and Missouri, Brown won every other swing state, including Wisconsin, California, and Oregon, as well as his home state of Ohio. He also narrowly won the traditionally Democratic states of Pennsylvania and Michigan. Dern became the first nominee of either party to win Missouri but lose the election since 1900. She also received highest raw vote total of any losing candidate in history up to that point. Fourteen states were won by either candidate by margins less than 3%, making this one of the closest elections in history. Ten states flipped their results from 2016. Brown's winning coalition relied on swinging high education middle and upper class white voters, a demographic that had been key to President Hanaway's two victories as well. Brown also won the Republican Party's traditional base of southern rural and midwestern white voters. Although Brown won the national popular vote by less than half a percent and 700,000 votes, he won 53% of the electoral vote. In such a close election, any number of factors may have been critical to the outcome. Dern supporters criticized unfavorable media coverage, while Democratic Party officials sought to blame candidate quality. The infamous "President Brown" ad of old footage of Dern praising the previous president Brown is also talked about by historians, as well as economic recovery under a Republican presidency, local concerns, and "upballot" trends from Congressional races.

Brown became the fourth consecutive governor elected president and ninth Ohioan. He was the second Ohioan governor named Brown elected president. With Brown's victory, the Republican Party won a third consecutive term in the White House, leading many to predict another era of single party domination like the 1980s for Republicans and 1990s-2000s for Democrats. However, Brown lost re-election in 2024 after becoming the first wartime president since Nelson Rockefeller.
imb4 "argargargarrg money money money"
 
Syxy9HX.png

The 2020 United States presidential election was the 59th quadrennial and 60th general presidential election, held on November 3, 2020. The Republican ticket of Ohio Governor Clancy Brown and former New York City Mayor Eric Adams defeated the Democratic ticket of Illinois Senator Laura Dern and former DNC Chair James Zogby.

Incumbent President Catherine Hanaway of the Republican Party declined to run for a third consecutive term, largely due to her unpopularity. As such, the Republican nomination was freely contested by numerous candidates. Vice President Eddie Abraham was considered the frontrunner and led most polls prior to 2020. However, due to his support among party delegates, he did not prepare for a serious primary campaign and was taken aback by the well funded and organized campaign of Ohio Governor Clancy Brown. Brown, a former congressman, son and grandson of congressmen, was a nationally popular figure among voters of both major parties as well as other groups. He had previously declined to run in 2008 and 2012, and was expected to do so again in 2020. He was persuaded to run after being recruited by a coalition of businessmen collectively known as "the Juniors" (Howard Hughes III, Fred Trump Jr., Jon Huntsman Jr., John Paul Getty III), who were concerned about Abraham's ability to lead during any potential military conflicts that were on the horizon. With their backing, Brown entered the contest and was enthusiastically received as he barnstormed across the country, winning the majority of the primary elections with his oratory and firm rhetoric in favor of "peace at all costs, but victory by any means." Despite Brown's popularity, Abraham retained the support of most party delegates largely due to the president's maneuvering and Brown had to bring the fight to the convention. The Vice President won the first four ballots, but Brown took the lead on the fifth, and after offering the vice presidency to Eric Adams, the leader of the New York delegation and a major leader among black Republicans, Brown won a majority on the eleventh ballot and therefore the nomination. Coming out of the convention, Brown was the first Republican to lead a presidential poll since 2014.

In contrast to the divided Republican nomination process, the Democratic Party had a fairly uneventful primary and convention. Illinois Senator and former Cabinet Secretary Laura Dern had long been favored for the nomination. After suffering two consecutive upset losses in 2012 and 2016, Democratic voters and party officials were ready to nominate one of their most popular and able candidates. Dern cleared the primary process without strong opposition, gained the support of the unions, and focused on laying the groundwork for a national campaign. She selected as her running mate former Congressman, White House staffer, and DNC Chair James Zogby. If elected, Zogby would have been the second consecutive Lebanese-American vice president. Indeed, the Dern campaign had largely been preparing to run against Abraham and were put on the backfoot by Brown's victory at the convention. Brown's popularity across demographics gave him a major advantage and his status as an outsider separated him from the unpopularity of the current administration.

Whereas the previous two elections had been dominated by the 2010s recession, the downturn from 2012 to 2018 had finally given way to a new period of growth. Banking regulations passed by Democrats in Congress over presidential veto restored consumer faith, inflation decreased, and energy tensions were eased by increased oil distribution from the Near East as well as the completion of all remaining Phase VII Nuclear Stations. However, economic recovery was unevenly spread by region and demographics. The manufacturing and construction sectors in particular had not bounced back as much as expected, and both campaigns presented plans to spur growth.

Debate over economic projects were soon overshadowed by news that Egypt and Korea both successfully tested nuclear weapons, pushing the number of nuclear powers over a dozen and greatly increasing tensions across Asia. Korea in particular now had leverage against both of its neighbors, China and Japan, who seemed closer to war than ever before. The two great powers responded to the Korean test by test firing missiles over the Pacific Ocean, with the Chinese in the area of the Philippines and Japan near Guam. The Japanese also began naval activity near the Chinese island of Taiwan. Both sides accused the other of arming Korea. In the United States, the presidential candidates were bombarded with questions of whether they would get involved in any Asian war, whether to protect American economic interests, or to support either side, both of which had close relations with the U.S. There was also considerable controversy over rumors of American assistance to the Egyptian and Korean nuclear programs, which would not be answered until after the election. Furthermore, a question which had not been discussed seriously since the revelation of American atomic weapons decades ago returned: would the new president utilize these weapons in war and become the first to do so? Dern was firm in her commitment to peace and non-usage, while Brown maintained that all options were on the table. The public was split on the issue, and research has been inconclusive as to what degree the candidates responses impacted voters.

On Election Day, Brown won core Republican regions in the South and Southwest, and Dern won the Northeast and Plains. Although Dern won swing states such as Florida, Kentucky, and Missouri, Brown won every other swing state, including Wisconsin, California, and Oregon, as well as his home state of Ohio. He also narrowly won the traditionally Democratic states of Pennsylvania and Michigan. Dern became the first nominee of either party to win Missouri but lose the election since 1900. She also received highest raw vote total of any losing candidate in history up to that point. Fourteen states were won by either candidate by margins less than 3%, making this one of the closest elections in history. Ten states flipped their results from 2016. Brown's winning coalition relied on swinging high education middle and upper class white voters, a demographic that had been key to President Hanaway's two victories as well. Brown also won the Republican Party's traditional base of southern rural and midwestern white voters. Although Brown won the national popular vote by less than half a percent and 700,000 votes, he won 53% of the electoral vote. In such a close election, any number of factors may have been critical to the outcome. Dern supporters criticized unfavorable media coverage, while Democratic Party officials sought to blame candidate quality. The infamous "President Brown" ad of old footage of Dern praising the previous president Brown is also talked about by historians, as well as economic recovery under a Republican presidency, local concerns, and "upballot" trends from Congressional races.

Brown became the fourth consecutive governor elected president and ninth Ohioan. He was the second Ohioan governor named Brown elected president. With Brown's victory, the Republican Party won a third consecutive term in the White House, leading many to predict another era of single party domination like the 1980s for Republicans and 1990s-2000s for Democrats. However, Brown lost re-election in 2024 after becoming the first wartime president since Nelson Rockefeller.
Always great to see more people using Clancy Brown. He's very underappreciated as a member of a political dynasty.
 
From a list I did over on the other place:
True Grit said:
Earlier today I stumbled across an article from 2004, which mentioned that Harry Reid was actively trying to convince Byron Dorgan to run for DNC Chair. Naturally, this caused me to fall down a bit of a rabbit hole - though I knew the name, I didn't know much specific about Dorgan. Reading a bit about him, he's a more interesting guy than I first assumed - contrary to what you might expect from a North Dakota Democrat, he was pretty progressive on just about every non-energy/guns issue, and was a vocal critic of Wall Street, the pharmaceutical industry, and free trade. This list basically comes from my desire to create a timeline where "progressive icon Byron Dorgan" is somehow a thing.

Presidents of the United States:
2001-2009: George W. Bush (Republican)

2000 (with Dick Cheney) def. Al Gore/Joe Lieberman (Democratic)
2004 (with Dick Cheney) def. Hillary Clinton/Tom Vilsack (Democratic)

2009-2015: John Edwards (Democratic)
2008 (with Byron Dorgan) def. John McCain/Tim Pawlenty (Republican)
2012 (with Byron Dorgan) def. Mitt Romney/Kelly Ayotte (Republican)

2015-2021: Byron Dorgan (Democratic)
2016 (with Elizabeth Warren) def. Marco Rubio/Kirk Dillard (Republican)
2021-2025: Elizabeth Warren (Democratic)
2020 (with Julian Castro) def. Rick Scott/Scott Walker (Republican)
2025-present: Lee Zeldin (Republican)
2024 (with Kim Reynolds) def. Elizabeth Warren/Julian Castro (Democratic)

Our POD here is that Hillary Clinton runs for the Democratic nomination in 2004; choosing to reward his loyalty and double down on her own moderate brand, she taps Virginia Governor Mark Warner, rather than Obama, to deliver the keynote address at the convention. Clinton narrowly loses to Bush, and while Obama's still elected to the Senate (and still seen as a rising star) he's not viewed as a presidential frontrunner as immediately as he was IOTL. Disheartened by the party's performance in rural areas, Dorgan bows to Reid's overtures and is elected Chair of the DNC, helping to oversee a stellar performance in the midterms two years later.

In a field that includes Obama, Warner, Tom Vilsack, John Kerry, and Bill Richardson, among others, John Edwards wins the Democratic nomination in 2008. Looking to combat questions about his experience, double down on his brand of left-wing populism, and reassure a somewhat skeptical party establishment, Edwards taps Dorgan as his running mate (worth mentioning that IOTL Dorgan was one of Edwards' earliest supporters in the 2004 veepstakes, so I suspect they had a decent enough relationship for him to make it onto the ticket); Edwards/Dorgan win a sizable victory over McCain/Pawlenty in November.

Though the POD almost certainly butterflies away his affair with Rielle Hunter - the two first met in 2006 - it seems indicative of Edwards' character/behaviour as a whole, so while I suspect he'd win re-election (though likely by a smaller margin than Obama did IOTL, both a result of various ethical issues and due to the fact that he'd likely have a weaker coalition overall) I'm a little skeptical he'd serve out his full eight years. Here, he resigns amid controversy in mid-2015, elevating Dorgan to the presidency. Running for a term of his own in 2016 and tapping first-term Massachusetts Senator Elizabeth Warren (someone he was a known fan of IOTL) in an effort to energize a disheartened base, Dorgan wins an upset victory over the far younger and more charismatic Marco Rubio as conservative voters opt to stay home.

Come 2020, frustrated after three election losses in a row, conservative populists are able to seize control of the Republican Party, nominating former Florida Governor Rick Scott (though I think Trump is out of the picture, seeing how easy it is to butterfly away him ever actually running for office and because a lot of his political career stems from the clearly racially motivated issues he had with Obama, the conditions that led to his rise IOTL are still bound to be present here; Scott essentially takes his place). A controversial figure at best, Scott proves equally unable to unify the party as a whole; with moderate Republicans voting Democratic or staying home, Elizabeth Warren is able to win a fourth straight victory for the Democrats, Dorgan having declined to seek another four years in office. The Democratic Party's luck can only last so long: with the country in the mood for a change after sixteen straight years of Democratic rule and the Republicans finally unifying behind the fresh-faced Lee Zeldin, Warren goes down in defeat after a single term in office.

Edwards-Dorgan-Warren-Zeldin-2016.png
 
2028 United States presidential election
Excelsior said:
Having become governor by defeating an embattled Kathy Hochul in a major upset, Lawler soon finds that being governor sucks when the Democratic supermajorities in the state legislature block his every move. This actually turns out to be a boon for him as he gets to travel the country drumming up support and becoming popular just for being a Republican who won a statewide election in New York. Having determined that his governorship will probably be of little consequence and he has no hope of winning re-election, he devotes his energies to running for president. He becomes a favorite of Republican donors and insiders and gets favorable media coverage as an epic liberal destroyer.

This is really nicely done all around, @Excelsior, but I've been meaning to ask something: do you think there might be another angle to the story? I've learned not too long ago that Lawler was the campaign manager for the 2014 Republican gubernatorial nominee, Westchester County Executive Rob Astorino - and loudly complained about a supposed re-election pact between Cuomo and Long Island Republicans. Would you say that Lawler ran at least in part on an "anti-corruption" angle, both for Governor of New York and for President?
 
This is really nicely done all around, @Excelsior, but I've been meaning to ask something: do you think there might be another angle to the story? I've learned not too long ago that Lawler was the campaign manager for the 2014 Republican gubernatorial nominee, Westchester County Executive Rob Astorino - and loudly complained about a supposed re-election pact between Cuomo and Long Island Republicans. Would you say that Lawler ran at least in part on an "anti-corruption" angle, both for Governor of New York and for President?
That would definitely play into it, corruption is an evergreen issue in New York and as seen in Lawler's infobox, his predecessor is not Kathy Hochul. I figured she leaves office at some point because of an issue of that nature, probably backroom dealings/financial impropriety. Not sure if it would translate to the federal level as it depends on the course of the Biden administration.
 
(sound of folder hitting desk)

FBI Director: I thought you'd want to see these.

(beat, sounds of papers flickering)

President: Where did you get--?

FBI Director: As the Director of the intelligence service, I thought it'd be important to do a little background check, y'know, to take care of your problems in case they crop up. Wouldn't want our new hotshot prez to get caught in the weeds in his first hundred days.

(beat)

FBI Director: I will admit, hiding them in the mass burial sites, it's clever. Nobody'd think to look for a dead body in a mass grave. Tho I'm sure radiation poisoning doesn't cause that kind of tissue scarification --

President: *chuckles* Lee, c'mon now, this is preposterous! It's...hideous, it's --

FBI Director: That's what I thought too, Mister President, but then I ran it by your itinerary. Colorado, Utah, Arizona...all the places you happened to visit as part of your work during the war. All featuring the same handiwork. All disappearing around the times you went on your little midnight jaunts the secret service pretend they didn't know about.

(beat)

President: What do you want, Lee?

FBI Director: I want what you want, Mister President. I want job security.

President: You think I'm gonna fire you?

FBI Director: *scoffs* no, no, definitely not now, huh? But I'm pretty sure a story like this doesn't just entitle me to a measly two terms of busywork, now does it?

(beat)

FBI Director: Fine, if you need me to say it out loud; I want on the SCOTUS.

President: I--did you even go to law school?

FBI Director: No, but Kim Andrews did. So did Sharon Auer--

President: I would think very hard about finishing that sentence, you little fruit--

FBI Director: Or what, you're gonna stab me?

(beat)

FBI Director: You should know, Mister President, that this doesn't die with me. If anything happens to me, I'll have manila folders passed along to your wife. Then the press. Then, I don't know, maybe your mother. Those photocopiers we managed to salvage sure did come in handy.

(beat, sound of footsteps)

President: Now, Lee, what was that you said?

FBI: I--what? I said I'd pass them along to your wi--

President: No, the bit before that. The bit about stabbing you.

(beat)

President: Now that you mention it--

(sounds of struggle, fabric ripping, gargling, loud thud)

(beat, then small click)

President: Uh, someone might wanna get in here. The Director's had an accident. A very bad one.

[tape ends]
1988yo.png
 
Last edited:
Back
Top