Crossposting my entry from the previous List Challenge to promote the current one! The theme for this month is Liberal X/Conservative Y, and the link to the challenge thread is in my sig. There's still 12 days left to enter!
Indigo Injury
Political Career of Joe Kennedy, Jr.
1940-1940: D
elegate to the Democratic National Convention
1941-1946:
Pilot, US Navy
1948-1952: Representative from Massachusetts' 11th District, Democrat
def 1948: Florence Luscomb (Progressive)
def 1950: Vincent Celeste (Republican)
1952: C
andidate for Senate from Massachusetts, Democrat
defeated by, 1952: Henry Cabot Lodge (Republican)
1954-1960: Representative from Massachusetts' 11th District, Democrat
def 1954: Charles S. Bolster (Republican)
def 1956: Vincent Celeste (Republican)
def 1958: Vincent Celeste (Republican)
1960-1970:
Senator from Massachusetts, Democrat
def 1960: Leverett Saltonstall (Republican)
def 1966: Edward Brooke (Republican)
1968-1969: C
andidate for the Democratic nomination for President of the United States
defeated by 1969 (with Sam Yorty): Stuart Symington, James Eastland, Howard Levy, Paul Fisher
1970: assassinated by
Kathy Boudin and Theodore Gold
Political Career of John "Fitz" Kennedy
1941-1942: E
nsign, US Navy Reserve
1942-1946: L
ieutenant, US Navy
1946-1961: Foreign correspondent
, Hearst Newspapers, Democrat
1956-1978
: O
pinion columnist and author, Hearst Newspapers, Democrat
1978-1985: O
pinion columnist and author, Hearst Newspapers, All-American
1984-1985: C
andidate for President of the United States, All-American
defeated by 1985 (with James Irwin): Ted Moore (United People's), George C. Lodge (Republican)
Political Career of Robert Kennedy
1944-1946: Seaman Apprentice, US Navy Reserve
1946-1948: Student, Harvard
1948-1950: Student, University of Virgina School of Law
1950-1953: Lawyer, US Department of Justice
1952-1952: Campaign manager, Joe Kennedy for Senate,
Democrat
1953-1956: Assistant counsel, Permanent Subcommittee on Investigations
1956-1960: Attorney General of Massachusetts,
Democrat
def 1956: George Fingold (Republican)
def 1958: Christian Herter, Jr. (Republicam)
1960-1960: Campaign manager, Joe Kennedy for Senate, Democrat
1960-1968: Lawyer, private practice
1966-1966: Campaign manager, Joe Kennedy for Senate,
Democrat
1968-1969: Campaign manager, Joe Kennedy for President,
Democrat
1969-1970: Lawyer, private practice
1970-1978: Attorney General of Massachusetts,
Democrat
def 1970: Donald Conn (Republican)
def 1974: Charles Cabot (Republican), Francis Belotti (United People's)
defeated by 1978: Francis Belotti (United People's), William Cowin (Republican)
1978-1985: Lawyer, private practice.
Political Career of Ted Moore
1959-1962: Lawyer, private practice
1962-1962: Candidate for the
Democratic nomination for Massachusett's 11th District
defeated by, 1962: Edward McCormack
1962-1968: Lawyer, private practice
1968-1969: Campaign assistant, Joe Kennedy for President,
Democrat
1969-1972: Lawyer, private practice
1972-1976: Representative from Wyoming's at-large District,
United People's
def 1972: William Kidd (Republican)
def 1974: Tom Strock (Republican)
1976-1984: Senator from Wyoming,
United People's
def 1976: Malcolm Wallop (Republican)
def 1982: Nels Larson (Republican), Richard Redland (All-American)
1984-1985: Candidate for President of the United States,
United People's
def 1985: Richard Hatcher, Wilbur Hobby, Wayne Cryts, Mario Cuomo, Oran Gragson, Paul Fisher
def 1985 (with Maynard Jackson): George C. Lodge (Republican), Fitz Kennedy (All-American)
Once upon a time, there was a king, and he had four sons.
The king said to himself "My kingdom, it is poor and weak. All my attempts to make it greater have failed, my attempts to make myself greater" (for kings always confuse theirselves and their kingdoms,) "have failed. All I can do now is to make my sons great, for their glory shall be the family's glory, which is my glory." (This is another way kings often become confused.) "As I wished to rule, my sons shall rule, and their rule shall last for a generation, and my name shall be pre-eminent among nations."
So the king prepared a plan to aid the rule of his sons.
The empire, of which the kingdom was part of, was in a great war against another empire overseas. Although he had himself proclaimed the glories of that other empire and counseled against war, the king sent his sons to war, that they might win valour for themselves and their house. And so they did, and all three of them would return from war, and the king's heart was overjoyed.
The king was aware that, although feared by many for his dealings, he was not much loved by any of his subjects. So the king had also had his sons polish their rhetoric, before and after they left for war, that they might learn how to sway the hearts of men and bring popularity to their house. And so they did, and all three would be leaders of men, and the king's heart was overjoyed.
It was known that the king had dealings with many an underhand man, and this was a stain on his banner. In contrast, the king had his sons study the laws of the empire they lived in, so they might learn the machineries of statecraft and how to avoid error (or at least how not to get caught doing so). And so they did, and all three would be men of the law, and the king's heart was overjoyed.
So it is that we tell of the three sons of the king; the warrior, the leader of men, the man of the law.
The warrior was the first son of the king, and he shone brightly in his father's eye, and so it was decided that he should inherit the throne, and one day succeed to the throne of the empire. Mighty a man was he, and he had fought valiantly against the foe, even if he held very little hatred in his heart for them, and so he stood well in the esteem of men. The word on his lips was war, always war, against the new empire to the East and those who sympathised with it, and those who opposed the rule of the Great Houses.
The leader of men was the second son of the king, and he shone brightly in his father's eye, and so it was decided that he should chronicle the annals of his brother, and smooth his path to the throne. Cunning a man was he, and he chronicled well the devastation of the foe and the building of a new world across the seas, even if he owed his place to his father's friends, and so he stood well in the esteem of men. The word on his lips was the people, always the people, who needed freedoms, who needed democracy, who needed the protection of the Great Houses.
The man of the law was the third son of the king, and he shone brightly in his father's eye, and so it was decided that he should guide and advise his brother, and smooth his path to the throne. Upright a man was he, and he exacted well the appropriate penalties for wrongdoing, even if with an eye for advancing his house's cause, and so he stood well in the esteem of men. The word on his lips was justice, always justice, meted out with a firm hand, but a fair hand, to those who threatened the lives of men and the dominion of the Great Houses.
You may recall, dear child, that this tale has not yet mentioned his fourth son; and that is no accident.
The fourth son of the king did not shine brightly in his father's eyes; indeed, he only shone as a replacement for his brothers, an understudy to fight when the warrior could not, speak when the leader could not, advise when the man of the law could not. Even in this, he failed, and after he lost the smaller estate of his brother to enemies and faltered in his efforts to speed the warrior to the throne (even though it was a fierce battle, with enemies on all sides), he was exiled--allowed to flee to the farthest West, to practice the law in that desolate land, with even his name, the name of his house, stripped from him.
This was the manner in which the king brought up his sons; and before he died, he was content, for he saw that his plans would proceed.
Lo, so it came to pass that after the warrior faltered and was denied the Imperial throne, his enemies, those inhabitants of the kingdom who he had called again and again to be warred against, came for him in the night, as a secret combination; and in a moment of fire and sound he was no more, and many of his allies went with him.
So it came to pass that, without his duty to advise the warrior, the man of the law did retire from the power-playing of the kingdom, for he had learnt well the lessons of the law, and strove only to exact them faithfully; and in truth, these lessons had made him weary of endlessly scheming to advance a hollow banner.
So it came to pass that without the counsel of law or strength of arm by his side, the leader of men grew shrill and impotent, railing and raging against the enemies he saw in the world, speaking only what would draw people to him; and lo, when he rode out in his brother's stead, alone, he was cut down, and perished utterly.
Lo, so it came to pass that the fourth son, whose name had been cut off, cut his brother down, and took the Imperial throne; and he was successful in war, beloved by the people, and ruled with justice, and undid all the works his father had sought to do.
Indeed do many things come to pass!
The Moral of This Story:
No matter how much your older sister may irritate you, do not lobotomise her.
--Robert Anton Wilson, Fairy Tales and Fables for The New World, MAD Magazine
