Lists of Heads of Government and Heads of State

[Qaz_plm]

I shuffled the deck and all I got was this t shirt
Eariler than OTL:Wartime Leader who dies
Eariler than OTL:Guy who was knew as mediocre but ITTL he's cool
Later than OTL:Guy with positive reputation but has a negative one ITTL
Later than OTL:Guy that stills in the opposition longer
Earlier Than OTL:Guy who was in a different political party OTL
Around the same time as time as OTL:Person who was in power for a long time but here's her term is short
Earlier Than OTL: who has in power for a long time but OTL his term was short
Later Than OTL: Guy known for being boring is cool
Earlier Than OTL: Guy known for cool is boring

 

[Sideways]

I shuffled the deck and all I got was this t shirt
Eariler than OTL:Wartime Leader who dies
Eariler than OTL:Guy who was knew as mediocre but ITTL he's cool
Later than OTL:Guy with positive reputation but has a negative one ITTL
Later than OTL:Guy that stills in the opposition longer
Earlier Than OTL:Guy who was in a different political party OTL
Around the same time as time as OTL:Person who was in power for a long time but here's her term is short
Earlier Than OTL: who has in power for a long time but OTL his term was short
Later Than OTL: Guy known for being boring is cool
Earlier Than OTL: Guy known for cool is boring

That's a burn on this whole genre

All it's missing is

Earlier than OTL: Unexpected and temporary rise of a third party
Earlier than OTL: Military government

 

[Japhy]

Chasing Shadows 1898 (With Apologies to @Mumby)

1893-1897: John M. Palmer / William E. Russell (Democratic)

1892: Benjamin Harrison / Whitlaw Reid (Republican), James B. Weaver / Ben Stockton Terrell (Populist)​

1897-1898: William J. Bryan / DeWitt C. Senter (Democratic, Silver, Populist)

1896: William McKinley / Garret A. Hobart (Republican), Thomas E. Watson (Populist), S. Grover Cleveland / Simon B. Buckner (National Democratic)​

1898: William J. Bryan / vacant (Democratic-Silver-Populist)
1898-1901: William J. Bryan / vacant (Democratic-Silver-Populist), Theodore Roosevelt (Republican) [As Secretary of General Affairs]
1901-1909: Theodore Roosevelt / Adlai E. Stevenson (Unionist)

1900: William F. “Buffalo Bill” Cody (Unionist), Bird Sim Coler / Charles W. Fairbanks (Non-Partisan Democratic-Republican), William J. Bryan / Jacob S. Coxey (Populist), Eugene V. Debs / Voltairine de Cleyre (Socialist-Labor)​

1904: Frederick D. Grant / T. Woodrow Wilson (“Sound Money” Democratic-Republican), James S. “Big Jim” Hogg / Charles A. Towne (Populist), Augustus Gillhaus / Charles H. Matchett (Socialist-Labor)​

11.1900-1.1900: Benjamin R. “Pitchfork Ben” Tillman / Marcus A. Hanna (Democratic / Republican) [Disputed] as Leader of the Blue-Gray Democracy

1909-1913: Theodore Roosevelt / Charles J. Bonaparte (Unionist)

1908: George R. Wellington / James K. Vardaman (“Independence” Democratic-Republican), Eugene V. Debs / Charles W. Macune (Farmer-Labor), Nelson W. Aldrich / George B. McClellan, Jr. (“Sound Money” Democratic-Republican), Joseph F. Malloney / Henry L. Slobodin (Socialist-Labor)​

1913-1917: Theodore Roosevelt / Harriet E. Stanton Blatch (Unionist)

1912: Carter Glass / James S. Sherman (“Sound Money” Democratic-Republican), James B. “Champ” Clark / Seth Low (Farmer-Labor)​

1913-1916: William R. Hearst / Thomas E. Watson (Independent) [Disputed] as Leader of the Constitutionalist Movement

1917-1921: Roy Hoffman / Alfred E. Smith (“Progressive” Unionist)

1916: Theodore Roosevelt / James M. Parker (“National” or "Know-Nothing" Unionist) Charles E. Russell / Ida B. Wells-Barnett (Farmer-Labor) Henry Ford / Charles G. Dawes (Conservative / “Sound Money” factions)​

The New York City Police Department was larger than the United States Marine Corps from the Civil War up to the start of the Second World War. Say for example that a bunch of filthy rich individuals could not sway an election in 1896 and their most dreaded enemy came to power. Imagine they think they need a charismatic, radical but "sound" man to lead an operation against this figure, and a colorful character who fits the bill just happens to be the leading member of the New York Police Board of Commissioners, and imagine that he is a loyal Republican but also... isn't. Give him unlimited power by force and where do things go from there?

...And then what happens when he's young enough that there isn't a ride off into the sunset coming any time soon for your cowboy-cop-warlord?

 

[Charles EP M.]

Later Than OTL: Guy known for being boring is cool

 

[morbidteaparty]

Bit early in the morning for NSFW @Skinny87 content

 

[theev]

I shuffled the deck and all I got was this t shirt
Eariler than OTL:Wartime Leader who dies
Eariler than OTL:Guy who was knew as mediocre but ITTL he's cool
Later than OTL:Guy with positive reputation but has a negative one ITTL
Later than OTL:Guy that stills in the opposition longer
Earlier Than OTL:Guy who was in a different political party OTL
Around the same time as time as OTL:Person who was in power for a long time but here's her term is short
Earlier Than OTL: who has in power for a long time but OTL his term was short
Later Than OTL: Guy known for being boring is cool
Earlier Than OTL: Guy known for cool is boring

1935-1962: Clement Attlee (Labour)
1935 (Majority): Stanley Baldwin (Conservative), John Simon (Liberal National), Herbert Samuel (Liberal)
1938: (Establishment of War Government)
1945 (Majority): Anthony Eden (Conservative), Archibald Sinclair (Unified Liberal)
1950 (Majority): Anthony Eden (Conservative), Archibald Sinclair (Unified Liberal)
1955 (Majority): Rab Butler (Conservative), Archibald Sinclair (Unified Liberal), Duncan Sandys (National)
1960 (Minority): Harold Macmillan (Conservative), Duncan Sandys (National), Gwilym Lloyd George (Unified Liberal)
1962-1975: James Callaghan (Labour)
1963 (Majority): Harold Macmillan (Conservative), Gwilym Lloyd George (Unified Liberal), various (National)
1968 (Majority): Reginald Maudling (Conservative), Jeremy Thorpe (Unified Liberal)
1973 (Majority): Reginald Maudling (Conservative), Jeremy Thorpe (Unified Liberal)
1975-1978: Harold Wilson (Labour)
1978-1987: Edward Heath (Conservative)
1978 (Majority): Harold Wilson (Labour), Tony Benn (Independent Labour), leadership vacant (Unified Liberal)
1982 (Majority): Roy Jenkins (Labour), Michael Foot (Independent Labour), David Steel (New Liberal)
1987-1989: Tony Blair (Conservative)
1987 (Majority): David Owen (Labour), David Penhaligon (Alliance)
1989-1992: Margaret Thatcher (Conservative)
1992-2007: Gordon Brown (Labour)
1992 (Majority): Margaret Thatcher (Conservative), David Penhaligon (Radical)
1997 (Majority): Ken Clarke (Conservative), Charles Kennedy (Radical)
2002 (Majority): Ken Clarke (Conservative), Charles Kennedy (Radical), Ian Paisley (Democratic Unionist)
2007-2014: John Major (Conservative)
2007 (Majority): Gordon Brown (Labour), Charles Kennedy (Radical), Ian Paisley (Democratic Unionist)
2012 (Majority): David Miliband (Labour), Peter Hain (Radical), Neil Hamilton (Democratic Unionist)
2014-2019: Alexander Johnson (Conservative)
2014 (Majority): Keir Starmer (Labour), Peter Hain (Radical), Neil Hamilton (Democratic Unionist)

1. "You will be judged by what you succeed at gentlemen, not by what you attempt."

Twenty-seven glorious years. Clement Attlee defeated Hitler and poverty and brought Stalin's empire to it's knees. Uncontested as the greatest Prime Minister in British history, Attlee is second only to President Walter Reuther in the American pantheon of Democratic Socialists and National Clement Attlee Day is a big holiday for American leftists. The greatest statesman of his era, Clement Attlee shaped world history more than any other Briton in the 20th century.

The size of his funeral rivalled those of the royal family.

2. "Never let me hear anyone say again that a Socialist State cannot provide outlets for those with initiative."

Attlee's surprise successor would not let him down. Callaghan represented the party's center and the issues of his time largely centered around social issues and foreign policy, two issues that many believe he handled more than adequately. Homosexuality was decriminalized in 1964, Abortion and the Pill became widely available in 1966, Zhdanov was humbled in Iran, and South China was saved from Mao's communist forces. Sunny Jim was able to do everything right and he's widely beloved across the contemporary political spectrum.

There is an annoying number of biographies about him.

3. "A week is a long time in politics."

It all fell to shit under Wilson. Never popular to begin with, the global recession, oil crisis, and standoff with the unions would bring Harold Wilson's government to its knees. Barely surviving a vote of no confidence in 1977, Wilson would limp into 1978's election just to get demolished. Wilson was seen as a paranoid fool by those on his right and a useless reactionary by those on his left. Maybe part of it was Labour's atrophy having been a ruling party for so long but many could not shake the feeling that Harold had led them straight into defeat.

He would end up being a better Late Night host.

4. "Action, not words."

After forty-three years of Labour government the Conservatives were back in power. Edward Heath achieved some quick successes early on. He stabilized the situation with the trade unions without calling in the army, his entrance to the European Economic Union is largely credited with stymieing the effects of the recession, and his victory in the Falklands cemented his government as strong in the eyes of the British people. Promoting mild reform without tearing apart the basis of the welfare state Labour built earned him high approval ratings and many in the country were disappointed to hear that he wasn't contesting the 1987 election.

Truly, one of the yachting community's finest.

5. "Weak! Weak! Weak!"

"Tory Tony" was here to make conservatism cool to Britain's youth. Elected Prime Minister shortly after his 34th birthday, Tony Blair became the youngest PM in British history. Although most crowed that he wouldn't stand a chance in a general election against Labour's David Owen, Tony pulled off a surprise victory. Tony would be remembered more for what he promised that what he did as two years into his government he was assassinated by a white supremacist seeking to start a race war in-line with the one prophesized in the Manson Diaries.

Neoliberalism is like doing an ollie on a skateboard or whatever.

6. "My job is to stop Britain from going red."

A bit of a reverse course from the hip modernism of the Blair years, Thatcher's hardline conservatism would alienate many in her party right from the get-go. Largely seen as a placeholder PM in the grand scheme of British History, many historians would declare that Thatcher didn't have much of a legacy at all.

Her unpopularity may have contributed to the dominance of her successor.

7. "There is nothing that you could say to me now that I could ever believe."

Many would say that they live in the product of Gordon Brown's Britain. A man whose legacy rivalled that of the modern predecessor he sought to ape, Brown would be the Labour Party's answer to Tory Tony. Brown's Modern Labour would borrow many traditionally Conservative economic policies. In his 15 years as Prime Minister Brown would implement nearly all of his Modern Labour agenda, sacrificing his party's economic policy for a lengthened return to power. Everything was smooth-sailing for Brown until the Indo-Pakistani Nuclear War devastated the global economy in 2005. Advisors urged him to stand down but Brown was convinced of his chances of victory until the balloting finally came in.

Regardless, for over a decade Gordon Brown was the one-eyed King of Britain.

8. "I am walking over hot coals suspended over a deep pit at the bottom of which are a large number of vipers baring their fangs."

Johnny Major, much like America's Billy Blythe, would be known more for his personality than any specific accomplishments. As the British political world settled into the New Consensus, Major became Prime Minister. Overseeing an economic recovery broadly supported by Westminster, Major would primarily push for social reforms like the legalization of Gay Marriage in 2008. His oft-rumored philandering would finally be confirmed by several reports in 2013 and Major promised Conservative Party leaders that he would step down before the next general election.

Major has spent his post-PM years as a Tech-Valley executive rumored to have an extravagant sex life.

9. "Life isn’t like coursework, baby. It’s one damn essay crisis after another."

The Conservative Party figured it was best replace their philandering charmer with a dour academic. The move would work and be aided by a worn-down Labour Party. Johnson was never truly cut-out to be Prime Minister, shying away from the spotlight typically associated with the office. It was little surprise that Johnson did not opt to lead his party into yet another general election.

Now the race to succeed Johnson heats up as the field as narrowed down to party stalwart and firebrand Theresa May and Johnson's more moderate former schoolmate, the ever gaffe-prone "Dodgy Dave" Cameron.

 

[Yokai Man]

1935-1962: Clement Attlee (Labour)
1935 (Majority): Stanley Baldwin (Conservative), John Simon (Liberal National), Herbert Samuel (Liberal)
1938: (Establishment of War Government)
1945 (Majority): Anthony Eden (Conservative), Archibald Sinclair (Unified Liberal)
1950 (Majority): Anthony Eden (Conservative), Archibald Sinclair (Unified Liberal)
1955 (Majority): Rab Butler (Conservative), Archibald Sinclair (Unified Liberal), Duncan Sandys (National)
1960 (Minority): Harold Macmillan (Conservative), Duncan Sandys (National), Gwilym Lloyd George (Unified Liberal)
1962-1975: James Callaghan (Labour)
1963 (Majority): Harold Macmillan (Conservative), Gwilym Lloyd George (Unified Liberal), various (National)
1968 (Majority): Reginald Maudling (Conservative), Jeremy Thorpe (Unified Liberal)
1973 (Majority): Reginald Maudling (Conservative), Jeremy Thorpe (Unified Liberal)
1975-1978: Harold Wilson (Labour)
1978-1987: Edward Heath (Conservative)
1978 (Majority): Harold Wilson (Labour), Tony Benn (Independent Labour), leadership vacant (Unified Liberal)
1982 (Majority): Roy Jenkins (Labour), Michael Foot (Independent Labour), David Steel (New Liberal)
1987-1989: Tony Blair (Conservative)
1987 (Majority): David Owen (Labour), David Penhaligon (Alliance)
1989-1992: Margaret Thatcher (Conservative)
1992-2007: Gordon Brown (Labour)
1992 (Majority): Margaret Thatcher (Conservative), David Penhaligon (Radical)
1997 (Majority): Ken Clarke (Conservative), Charles Kennedy (Radical)
2002 (Majority): Ken Clarke (Conservative), Charles Kennedy (Radical), Ian Paisley (Democratic Unionist)
2007-2014: John Major (Conservative)
2007 (Majority): Gordon Brown (Labour), Charles Kennedy (Radical), Ian Paisley (Democratic Unionist)
2012 (Majority): David Miliband (Labour), Peter Hain (Radical), Neil Hamilton (Democratic Unionist)
2014-2019: Alexander Johnson (Conservative)
2014 (Majority): Keir Starmer (Labour), Peter Hain (Radical), Neil Hamilton (Democratic Unionist)

1. "You will be judged by what you succeed at gentlemen, not by what you attempt."

Twenty-seven glorious years. Clement Attlee defeated Hitler and poverty and brought Stalin's empire to it's knees. Uncontested as the greatest Prime Minister in British history, Attlee is second only to President Walter Reuther in the American pantheon of Democratic Socialists and National Clement Attlee Day is a big holiday for American leftists. The greatest statesman of his era, Clement Attlee shaped world history more than any other Briton in the 20th century.

The size of his funeral rivalled those of the royal family.

2. "Never let me hear anyone say again that a Socialist State cannot provide outlets for those with initiative."

Attlee's surprise successor would not let him down. Callaghan represented the party's center and the issues of his time largely centered around social issues and foreign policy, two issues that many believe he handled more than adequately. Homosexuality was decriminalized in 1964, Abortion and the Pill became widely available in 1966, Zhdanov was humbled in Iran, and South China was saved from Mao's communist forces. Sunny Jim was able to do everything right and he's widely beloved across the contemporary political spectrum.

There is an annoying number of biographies about him.

3. "A week is a long time in politics."

It all fell to shit under Wilson. Never popular to begin with, the global recession, oil crisis, and standoff with the unions would bring Harold Wilson's government to its knees. Barely surviving a vote of no confidence in 1977, Wilson would limp into 1978's election just to get demolished. Wilson was seen as a paranoid fool by those on his right and a useless reactionary by those on his left. Maybe part of it was Labour's atrophy having been a ruling party for so long but many could not shake the feeling that Harold had led them straight into defeat.

He would end up being a better Late Night host.

4. "Action, not words."

After forty-three years of Labour government the Conservatives were back in power. Edward Heath achieved some quick successes early on. He stabilized the situation with the trade unions without calling in the army, his entrance to the European Economic Union is largely credited with stymieing the effects of the recession, and his victory in the Falklands cemented his government as strong in the eyes of the British people. Promoting mild reform without tearing apart the basis of the welfare state Labour built earned him high approval ratings and many in the country were disappointed to hear that he wasn't contesting the 1987 election.

Truly, one of the yachting community's finest.

5. "Weak! Weak! Weak!"

"Tory Tony" was here to make conservatism cool to Britain's youth. Elected Prime Minister shortly after his 34th birthday, Tony Blair became the youngest PM in British history. Although most crowed that he wouldn't stand a chance in a general election against Labour's David Owen, Tony pulled off a surprise victory. Tony would be remembered more for what he promised that what he did as two years into his government he was assassinated by a white supremacist seeking to start a race war in-line with the one prophesized in the Manson Diaries.

Neoliberalism is like doing an ollie on a skateboard or whatever.

6. "My job is to stop Britain from going red."

A bit of a reverse course from the hip modernism of the Blair years, Thatcher's hardline conservatism would alienate many in her party right from the get-go. Largely seen as a placeholder PM in the grand scheme of British History, many historians would declare that Thatcher didn't have much of a legacy at all.

Her unpopularity may have contributed to the dominance of her successor.

7. "There is nothing that you could say to me now that I could ever believe."

Many would say that they live in the product of Gordon Brown's Britain. A man whose legacy rivalled that of the modern predecessor he sought to ape, Brown would be the Labour Party's answer to Tory Tony. Brown's Modern Labour would borrow many traditionally Conservative economic policies. In his 15 years as Prime Minister Brown would implement nearly all of his Modern Labour agenda, sacrificing his party's economic policy for a lengthened return to power. Everything was smooth-sailing for Brown until the Indo-Pakistani Nuclear War devastated the global economy in 2005. Advisors urged him to stand down but Brown was convinced of his chances of victory until the balloting finally came in.

Regardless, for over a decade Gordon Brown was the one-eyed King of Britain.

8. "I am walking over hot coals suspended over a deep pit at the bottom of which are a large number of vipers baring their fangs."

Johnny Major, much like America's Billy Blythe, would be known more for his personality than any specific accomplishments. As the British political world settled into the New Consensus, Major became Prime Minister. Overseeing an economic recovery broadly supported by Westminster, Major would primarily push for social reforms like the legalization of Gay Marriage in 2008. His oft-rumored philandering would finally be confirmed by several reports in 2013 and Major promised Conservative Party leaders that he would step down before the next general election.

Major has spent his post-PM years as a Tech-Valley executive rumored to have an extravagant sex life.

9. "Life isn’t like coursework, baby. It’s one damn essay crisis after another."

The Conservative Party figured it was best replace their philandering charmer with a dour academic. The move would work and be aided by a worn-down Labour Party. Johnson was never truly cut-out to be Prime Minister, shying away from the spotlight typically associated with the office. It was little surprise that Johnson did not opt to lead his party into yet another general election.

Now the race to succeed Johnson heats up as the field as narrowed down to party stalwart and firebrand Theresa May and Johnson's more moderate former schoolmate, the ever gaffe-prone "Dodgy Dave" Cameron.

OH YES

 

[Walpurgisnacht]

Neoliberalism is like doing an ollie on a skateboard or whatever.

I nearly coughed up my own lungs laughing reading that. Great job.

 

[Ares96]

1935-1962: Clement Attlee (Labour)
1935 (Majority): Stanley Baldwin (Conservative), John Simon (Liberal National), Herbert Samuel (Liberal)
1938: (Establishment of War Government)
1945 (Majority): Anthony Eden (Conservative), Archibald Sinclair (Unified Liberal)
1950 (Majority): Anthony Eden (Conservative), Archibald Sinclair (Unified Liberal)
1955 (Majority): Rab Butler (Conservative), Archibald Sinclair (Unified Liberal), Duncan Sandys (National)
1960 (Minority): Harold Macmillan (Conservative), Duncan Sandys (National), Gwilym Lloyd George (Unified Liberal)
1962-1975: James Callaghan (Labour)
1963 (Majority): Harold Macmillan (Conservative), Gwilym Lloyd George (Unified Liberal), various (National)
1968 (Majority): Reginald Maudling (Conservative), Jeremy Thorpe (Unified Liberal)
1973 (Majority): Reginald Maudling (Conservative), Jeremy Thorpe (Unified Liberal)

please pump shit directly into veins

 

[Meppo]

This was intended to be a shitpost and took way too long.

POD: Lyndon B. Johnson's heart attack on July 2, 1955 proves to be fatal.

1961-1963: Richard M. Nixon (CA) / Henry Cabot Lodge Jr. (MA) (Republican)
1960: def. John F. Kennedy (MA) / Stuart Symington (MO) (Democratic), Harry F. Byrd (VA) / various (Southern Democrat unpledged electors)
1963-1965: Henry Cabot Lodge Jr. (MA) / vacant (Republican)
1965-1969: Henry Cabot Lodge Jr. (MA) / William F. Knowland (CA) (Republican)
1964: def. John F. Kennedy (MA) / George Smathers (FL) (Democratic), Edwin Walker (TX) / Ross Barnett (MS) (Stand for America!)
1969-1977: Frank G. Clement (TN) / Clement J. Zablocki (WI) (Democratic)
1968: def. William F. Knowland (CA) / Spiro Agnew (MD) (Republican),
1972: def. Barry Goldwater (AZ) / Ray Shafer (PA) (Republican), Eugene McCarthy (MN) / Pete McCloskey (CA) (Progressive)
1977-1982: Tom McCall (OR) / Guy Vander Jagt (MI) (Republican)
1976: def. Clement J. Zablocki (WI) / Ben Barnes (TX) (Democratic)
1980: def. James Carter (GA) / Gerry Ferraro (NY) (Democratic), John B. Anderson (IL) / Cesar Chavez (AZ) (Progressive)
1982: Guy Vander Jagt (MI) / vacant (Republican)
1982-1985: Guy Vander Jagt (MI) / Manuel Lujan (NM) (Republican)
1985-1989: Mario Biaggi (NY) / William B. Fitzgerald (MI) (Democratic)
1984: def. Guy Vander Jagt (MI) / Manuel Lujan (NM) (Republican)
1989-1994: Joseph Biden (DE) / Mike Curb (CA) (Republican)
1988: def. Mario Biaggi (NY) / William B. Fitzgerald (MI) (Democratic)
1992: def. William B. Fitzgerald (MI) / Samuel Nunn (GA) (Democratic)
1994-1995: Mike Curb (CA) / vacant (Republican)
1995-1997: Mike Curb (CA) / Bob Martinez (FL) (Republican)
1997-2005: Mary Landrieu (LA) / Tony P. Hall (OH) (Democratic)
1996: def. Mike Curb (CA) / Bob Martinez (FL) (Republican)
2000: def. Fife Symington (AZ) / Jim Bunning (KY) (Republican)
2005-2009: Gil Gutknecht (MN) / Bill Bradley (NJ) (Republican)
2004: def. Rick Perry (TX) / Joe Lieberman (CT) (Democratic)
2009-2013: Harold Ford Jr. (TN) / John Kitzhaber (OR) (Democratic)
2008: def. Gil Gutknecht (MN) / Bill Bradley (NJ) (Republican)
2013-2021: Bill Romney (MI) / Loretta Sanchez (CA) (Republican)
2012: def. Harold Ford Jr. (TN) / John Kitzhaber (OR) (Democratic)
2016: def. Liz Herring (TX) / David Beasley (SC) (Democratic)
2021-present: Michael Flynn (RI) / Rod Blagojevich (IL) (Democratic)
2020: def. J. Hunter Biden (DE) / Bill Richardson (NM) (Republican), Sean Reyes (UT) / H. Ross Perot (TX) (Moderate)

Spoiler: Broad points and highlights

• Democrats and Republicans are rather more big-tent entities ITTL, with the former tending towards Keynesianism and mildly conservative working-class Christian democracy and the latter tending towards mild libertarianism.
• As such, racial politics are also rather blurred: for one, the African-American vote is split rather more evenly IOTL, and tends to swing towards candidates perceived to be more supportive of Black issues regardless of party (for example, many African-American voters who turned out in droves for Ford '08 would vote for Biden '20, strengthening his lead in Maryland and Virginia).
• Richard Nixon's presidency is fairly mediocre, dominated by foreign policy (specifically the Pig Bay Invasion and the subsequent Cuban Insurgency) more than anything. Nixon pushes forward a rather weak civil rights bill that earns him much enmity from liberals in his party and civil rights figures; the debate about whether Dick would get a second term or not is abruptly ended by a Texan gunman. The assassination of Nixon, hardly as charismatic or as extraverted as his 1960 opponent, is not viewed as the end of an era and isn't as nearly as transformative in the eyes of the public.
• As of now, Jack Kennedy is remembered by historians as a slightly uglier Adlai Stevenson: although he kept the polls tight throughout the entire 1964 electoral campaign, the Kennedy charm had worn off by then as Jack flip-flopped on segregation and his sexual indiscretions became more and more visible.
• Henry Cabot Lodge Jr., a strong advocate for an all-encompassing Civil Rights Act, ensures its passage with help from Mike Mansfield and Everett Dirksen. Compared to his predecessor, HCL is far more proactive and less pro-detente on the foreign front, and - despite conflicts with Vice President Knowland, selected as a sop to conservative Republicans - doubles down on liberating Cuba from far-left elements and keeping South Vietnam alive.
• Which becomes an issue when Washington D.C. finds itself bogged down in riots, the Vietnam War is stalled and relations between Lodge and Knowland turn downright antagonistic. It is in this environment that a certain veteran Southern governor's theatrical, sermon-like speeches are more than welcomed by the Democratic Party; tapering down alcohol intake doesn't hurt either.
• President Clement presides over the introduction of the Moral Society, an oil boom in the West and a carefully negotiated peace agreement leading to the division of Vietnam lasting for a long time. From then on, however, Clement's foreign policy is dominated by detente with General Secretary Podgorny, one which is shaken by Alvaro Cunhal's Portugal and the Estado de Calamidad.
• The 1972 Republican primaries saw Barry Goldwater narrowly defeat Rocky and a multitude of liberal "favorite son" candidates; the nomination was seen as a bit of an embarrassment by liberal media as Goldwater was never able to live down his opposition to the Civil Rights Act of 1964 or his proposed solution to the Vietnam War. As such, Goldwater was pressured to select a moderate, pro-Eastern Establishment governor. Eugene McCarthy had high hopes for the election, advertising his Progressive campaign for those opposed to Goldwater and Clement's "warmongering abroad and at home", but his poll standing deteriorated rapidly after his Vice Presidential nominee commented on the Republican ticket's alleged "divided loyalties".
• Tom McCall's ascension to power was in large part built on his opposition to some of the most loathed elements of Clement's presidency: the War on Drugs, the War on Radicalism and the war in Iberia, all of which crystallized the Republican Party's libertarian faction. While McCall's independent streak would put him at odds with his conservative Vice President and the GOP old guard, it would also pave the way for presidents such as Biden and Romney.
• New York Governor Biaggi's law-and-order governance of the country was short-lived, as allegations of corruption on his and Sec. of State Charlie Wilson's part brought about his downfall. William B. Fitzgerald's political career hasn't been the same ever since, as his presidential campaign was stymied by moralistic Tennessee Senator and 1992 presidential candidate Albert Gore.
• The presidency of Joseph R. Biden remains one of the most memorable in American pop culture, as the folksy, youthful "average Joe" presided over the fall of the Soviet Union, the liberalization of the world order and a economic boom - only to succumb to a brain aneurysm in April 1994. Having to deal with both the Rwandan Genocide and the Iranian Civil War, Vice President Michael Curb was unable to carry Joe's mantle effectively.
• Mary Landrieu and Tony Hall pulled America towards a more Christian Democratic, internationalist direction, strengthening Clement's World Corps and attempting to build a social market economy. It doesn't quite work out, as by 2004 - disaffected by the recession and the aftermath of the Iranian Civil War - the American electorate shifts towards isolationism, electing moderate conservative Governor Gil Gutknecht of Minnesota.
• Texas remains a Democrat state, though many people in the suburbs and the west tend to vote Republican. In recent years, two state governors - Rick Perry and Liz Herring - have been nominated for President, though self-described "Silber Dem" Herring is considered more moderate than her predecessor.
• The 2020 presidential election was deeply polarized, as the internationalist, "hyper-libertarian" Governor of Delaware J. Hunter Biden is pitted against populist Lieutenant General Michael Flynn. Both men are practically soaked in scandal, what's with Biden's alleged drug use and shady dealings in China and Flynn's Islamophobic canards; the Moderate ticket ended up winning 45% of the popular vote in Utah.

 

[Cevolian]

Just shut up man!​

1981-1988: Ronald Reagan (Republican)
1980 (with George H.W. Bush) def. Jimmy Carter (Democratic), John Anderson (Independent)
1984 (with George H.W. Bush) def. Walter Mondale (Democratic)
1988-1989: Jim Wright (Democratic)
1989-1993: Donald J. Trump (Independent)
1988 (with Lowell Weicker) def. William Clinton (Democratic), Lamar Alexander (Republican)
1993-0000: Joe Biden (Democratic)
1992 (with Tim Wirth) def. Donald J. Trump (American), Pat Robertson (Republican)

When Bush went down over Iran-Contra in '87, we all thought that was the end of it, but after the Tower Commission whitewashed whatever the hell went on down there in Nicaragua the Dems in the Senate wouldn't give up, and they kept looking and looking and looking until they found everything and Joe Biden and the hacks on the Judiciary Committee wrote up Articles of Impeachment. Six months after Bush the Gipper was gone too. And then, when they have their guy in the White House and nominate that handsome as shit charismatic Good Ole Boy Billy Clinton from Arkansas, the Democrats blow it. Turns out the nominee's a sex pest, and miraculously a guy whose list of infidelities is even longer than Slick Willy's cashes in on it. In a fit of rage the American people pick Donald Trump to be their President, on a promise he'll be tough on corruption at home and tougher on Japan and the Ruskies abroad. That was almost too true. The rockets nearly went flying over Crimea in '91, and the Soviet hardliners never looked back: three years after the end of the Cold War the Iron Curtain fell again, cutting Ukraine in two, and locking Russia and Belarus outside the Free World. Even before the recession peaked in '91 it was obvious Trump had to go: even the Veep knew it, and Weicker retired quietly to New Haven. And that's where Diamond Joe came in, and with the Republicans going further down the rabbit hole with Robertson and Duke in '92, Delaware's Golden Boy sailed into the White House.

 

[Blackentheborg]

Big Fat Eggs of Solid Fuck
1. Leaders of the Labour party 2016-onward

2015-2019: Jeremy Corbyn (Nutter)
Let me tell you the tragic tale of Jezza the Wise. The most elected leader in Labour history twice-over. Champion of the socialist left. Unfortunately very wishy-washy about Brexit. Sure, being skeptical of the free market is all well and good, but the tides have changed, Jeremy. You can try to revitalize the NHS all you want but people will absolutely get on you about how you opted for second referendum instead of outright cancelling the thing. Even when the food banks were raided and the armed forces were being rolled down Deansgate, Corbyn stood firm and said it was a more democratic process to let the people decide yet again, because that went so well last time. In spite of all the fuss, yeah, we would've been much better off with the Corbyster in charge. Ol' Comrade Corbyn. Wait, where was I going with this?
2021-2023: Kier Stramer (Gaitskellist)
The obvious replacement in the eyes of the Labour Elite, Stramer was a classic Labour leader, in the way that he was absolutely unremarkable in every way. He would listen to the centre instead of call them out, he would stay in line, and he definitely wouldn't ruffle feathers. This, unfortunately, relegated Labour back to being ineffectual, which some surprised them when the votes stopped coming in. It couldn't be for that Green Party, or the new leftist offshoot flavour of the month, now could it? No, people knew Labour. People liked Labour! They're not the ones out of touch, it's the kids who are wrong! No matter how many times he talked about how his parents gave him a 'socialist name', the voters just didn't Kier for him much. Haha, see what I di--ah forget it. They didn't win any elections, if that's what you're wondering.
2023-2027: Rosena Allin-Khan (Bevanite)
For the second attempt, the Brits tried learning a lesson from one of their former colonies. The New Zealand Labour party had been similarly relegated to uselessness, until they found their new leader in the form of the overtly charismatic Jacinda Ardern. She won them five general elections, even after bungling a whole lot of stuff. The UK Labour party found their Ardern in the form of Allin-Khan. Successor to Sadiq Khan (no relation) when he left his Tooting seat to become Mayor of London, Rosena seemed to ooze a likability the party had been lacking for a while now. Of course, just like Stramer, it eventually became apparent that she too lacked substance. Luckily, the further left corner of the labour party had just the gal.
2027-2033: Nadia Whittome (Nutter)
Former baby of the House of Commons, poster child for the Labour Left, and rambunctious as Tony Blair was when he was still nicking ciggies at the corner-shop, Whittome was electorally ferocious. There are countless youtube compilations of her tearing into Kassam and the Brexit Party, Mulready and the Cornerstone Party, even ol' Nukey and her Lib Dems when they tried to stray to far to the wavy-gravy centre. Keep in mind there was also an equal amount, if not more, of videos lambasting her as a hysterical leftist. But that lot have always been there, and they will continue to be. She could have agreed with Cleverly on every single policy and still be labeled a marxist. Ignore 'em. Reid almost singlehandedly brought back the Corbynite majority. Despite her popularity, she still wouldn't scrape up enough votes to become PM, and pressure from the inner circles eventually led her to jump ship to the Unite! camp. People are mean.
2033-20??: Eli Aldridge (Blairite)
And now we reach Young Eli, the Comeback Kid, who first became a household name when he won a micron-sized amount over Tim Farron's safe seat. He was running for office when he was taking his A-levels, so of course the higher ups like pinning him as the second coming. He still wouldn't get the honour of becoming PM, tho. But he is in with the coalition, tho. All he has to do is wait until the electoral balance tips again, away from this ungodly Greens/Unite! fusion, and finally Labour will be in the drivers seat again...

 

[Blackentheborg]

Big Fat Eggs of Solid Fuck
2. Leaders of the Conservative party 2016-onward

2005-2016: David Cameron (Thatcherite)
If you asked kids born in the last 10 years what they think of David Cameron, they might be inclined to tip their heads to the side, like a confused dog, and ask "Whats a David Cameron?" More than likely they'd be too busy looking at the hottest memes to care about some old dude who used to be Prime Minister. You're much better off asking the coots in retirement homes, or even your parents as they're sitting across from you at the coffee table. They'll usually have a copy of his autobiography. Apparently he fucked a pig once, like in Black Mirror? I dunno. Next.
2016-2019: Theresa May (Thatcher-lite)
Ah, but this one, they all remember this one. She definitely didn't start Brexit, sure, but she was well and truely the architect for what it would eventually become. Was it a red, white or blue Brexit we got in the end? No idea. I don't think she knew much herself. Most are suprised mostly by how long she lasted as PM, even after refusing to debate Corbyn during her own snap election.
2019-2022: Boris Johnson (Euclid)
History classes fuckin' adore Bojo. I mean, so do misogynistic ultranationalists, but don't go there, focus on the hosts of HIGNFY making fun of his haircut. Remember that time he called someone a supine invertebrate jelly? Haha, funny man. Unsurprisingly he didn't last long as PM. We're pretty sure he was more a puppet for the inner party circle than someone who knew what he was doing. After Brexit failed to go through by October's end, and after a GE was sussed, Boris sort of shrunk away, which was interesting. We thought he'd stick aroundLast we heard he'd propped himself up as a hedge fund manager and was walking around with a cane, occasionally peppering his conversations with the apparent benefits of polygamy. Some say the cane is made from the thighbone of the last wild Indian Elephant. If we see him we'll make sure to ask.
2022-2027: Priti Patel (Urquhartite)
After deposing of the orangutan in a suit, the Tories still needed someone who could launch hardliner policies but still whip the media into a frenzy at a moments notice. Thankfully, at Bojo's insistence, Patel had been brought into the cabinet as Home Secretary, which very quickly became a stepping stone. Where Theresa couldn't deliver, and Boris stumbled. Patel followed through and then some. Which is probably why she was the last Prime Minister insofar to emerge from the original "big two". She was ruthless, she was graceful, and she never took any prisoners (discounting, of course, the whole thing out in Blackpool). For a while people joked about how she stumbled her way upward, but they quickly shut up when she cut through the political process like a knife. You know why she stepped down? Too tired of winning. No, not the conflicts of interest, or the inquiries about Spratly or Genoa, or even whatever got her to disappear into thin air when it seemed like she owed quite a bit of blood money to Columbus Nova.
2027-20??: James Cleverly (Thatcherite)
Freshly anointed in the sacred oils and still hoping for 'a valid Brexit', Cleverly from Braintree (very smart fellow) was intended to be a moderate antidote to the increasingly aggressive Patel era. Where the Nu-Left would be populist, the Tories would be pragmatic. But already they were too far gone. When your predecessor aligned your party with the DUP and Kassam's lot, it's kind of hard to wedge yourself away from the crypto-nationalistic approach, especially when you're the only reason one of them was Prime Minister in the first place. But what does that matter? He's Prime Minister now. What are you gonna do, with your swarm of splintered leftist parties!? Upturn the entire system? I'D LIKE TO SEE YOU TRY!

 

[theev]

The Unfortunate End of the United States

1933-1937: John Nance Garner (Democratic)
1937-1937: Huey Long (Union)
1936 (with John R. Brinkley): John Nance Garner (Democratic), Frank Knox (Republican)
1937-1945: John R. Brinkley (Union)
1940 (with William Langer): Wendell Willkie (National Union), Upton Sinclair (Socialist)
1945-1949: Charles Lindbergh (Union)
1944 (with Gerald Nye): Earl Warren [replacing Richard E. Byrd] (National Union), Glen Taylor (Socialist)
1949-1953: John L. Lewis (National Union)
1948 (with Henry A. Wallace): Charles Lindbergh (Union)
1953-1954: Gerald L. K. Smith (Union)
1952 (with William E. Riker): John L. Lewis (National Union), Frank Lausche (Independent)
1954-1960: William E. Riker (Union)
1956 (with William Dudley Pelley): Orson Welles (National Union), John L. Lewis (UMW), John Steinbeck (Socialist), Rexford Tugwell (New), Irving Fiske (Independent), Dwight D. Eisenhower (Independent), Joe P. Kennedy Jr. ('Moderate' Union)
1960-1966: William E. Riker (American)
1960 (with William Dudley Pelley): Robert Heinlein ('Opposition' Union), Harry F. Byrd Sr. (Independent)
1964 (with L. Ron Hubbard): unopposed
1966-1981: L. Ron Hubbard (American)
1981-2007: Charles Maddox (American)
Dissolution of the United States

The modern doctrine of states' rights can be attributed to John R. Brinkley. As Kansas' Governor, Brinkley led a whole coterie of gubernatorial mavericks in denouncing what they feared would be potential infringement of states' rights by the incoming Roosevelt administration. They would not fear for long, however, as Roosevelt was taken out by an assassin's bullet weeks before he would have been sworn in as President. His running mate, the conservative John Nance Garner, promised to not "shake up the current balance between state and country" and doled out a much more limited version of Roosevelt's planned reform package. By 1936, President Garner was deeply unpopular. The country was still in the throes of the Great Depression and Garner's evacuation of the regions impacted by the Dust Bowl was seen as one of the most poorly executed political maneuvers in modern American history. Garner looked weak, and seizing on that weakness was Louisiana Senator Huey Long.

Union [of States] was the party-line that Long announced he was running on in January, 1936. As Long increasingly emphasized "states' rights and autonomy" in his speeches it became no surprised that he selected Kansas Governor Brinkley as his running mate. Long would triumph in November over two parties that were now being seen by most Americans as inept or corrupt. Long, like Roosevelt before him, would not be long for the Presidency. On March 8, 1937 physician Carl Weiss assassinated President Long over a personal dispute as Long left the Capitol following a long day battling congress on his Share Our Wealth reform package. Long's death displayed the fractures within his movement. The Union Party had been joined by populists of all stripes and while Long sought to maintain balance between the Party Left, Right, and Center his successor did not share his sentiments.

President Brinkley compromised heavily on the Share Our Wealth program, leading Frances Townsend to denounce his administration and causing many left-wing Unionists to walk. Although Brinkley would deal with much of the Dust Bowl by the end of decade (and promote resettlement of the impacted regions throughout the 1940s) the domestic decision that would most dominate headlines would be the establishment of a safe-zone for Jewish refugees in Southern Alaska. Many were surprised that Brinkley, a virulent anti-semite, would favor the move. Historical record lends credence to the theory that Long-era Secretary Harold Ickes convinced the President that the move would "bring him glory" and "not by any means lead to integration." Initial outrage to the move dissipated quickly but the precedent established by Brinkley would not be forgotten. Men like Virgil Effinger moved to control swathes of territory rather than merely work within it while the Nation of Islam and the Ku Klux Klan proposed doctrines of "community self-reliance" and many of America's economically destitute saw the idea of packing up and starting somewhere new as increasingly appealing.

Formed in response to an atrocious 1938 midterm, the combined establishment front that was the National Union Party sought to oust President Brinkley and the Unionists. Armed with a handsome industrialist with bipartisan appeal, rebuilt political machinery, and good polling the National Unionists seemed unstoppable. Until they were stopped. Although he won the popular vote, Wendell Willkie would finish second in the electoral college as Brinkley benefitted from an electorally over-represented west and a strong splinter campaign by Governor Upton Sinclair, whose utopian message struck a chord with the desperate nation.

Isolation and migration would define John Brinkley's second term as President. World War II raged across the Old World as Hitler's Germany and Chiang Kai-Shek's China rolled through their neighbors. Brinkley and his cabinet were uninterested in getting involved and soon the issue became partisan as men like Wendell Willkie and James Roosevelt called for intervention to protect Britain, and later the Soviet Union. The passage of Secretary of National Defense Charles Lindbergh's Fortress America plan would be one of the biggest successes of Brinkley's presidency. The other big success of Brinkley's second term would come in the form of the President's Migration Dole, which was a subsidy given to state governments to facilitate the movement of their citizens. The Dole was variously utilized by state governments and their citizens. Some American Jews fled to Southern Alaska to avoid rising persecution, many hoped to strike it big re-settling the American West, southern states used the Dole to terrorize their black residents, and many people from communists to fascists to con-men were able to secure state funds to start their own communities.

Going into the 1944 election, the Second World War rapidly became the most important issue. There was a bipartisan consensus on re-settlement and migration but serious partisan divisions regarding foreign policy. These divisions were only further highlighted when Secretary Lindbergh was nominated by the Unionist Party on a purely 'Stay-Out-of-the-War' platform and Admiral Byrd was nominated by the National Unionists on a platform of defending the British Empire and breaking the Russo-German stalemate. The polls were tight but generally favored Admiral Byrd, even as the American economy sluggishly exited the Great Depression. Byrd would be assassinated by a member of the German-American Bund while at a campaign stop in September. Although California Governor Earl Warren put up a valiant effort and rallied sympathy to the wounded ticket, a plurality of voters and a majority of electors would choose Lindbergh in November.

Lindbergh would continue the migration policies of Brinkley, albeit with a bit of a more segregationist bent than his predecessor. The ship of state would largely be steady (or as steady as it could be) until the end of World War II in 1947 with the retreat of Zhdanov's forces past the Urals (where he faced execution from Lavrentiy Beria, who would soon face execution from the Red Army) and the signing of the Paris Agreement between Britain and Germany. In the immediate aftermath of war the global economy headed back into recession and the Long Winter of 1947-48 was countered by austerity in the United States. Lindbergh's austerity was met with industrial action on a scale not seen in decades as America's dying unions sought to demand labor rights when they still could. The strikes were deeply controversial, particularly when home-heating was impacted in the midst of the cold winter, but the crackdown against them was even more so. As soldiers dismantled America's rump labor movement, many fled to the budding communes and syndicates of the country's interior to restart their lives and potentially live their idealistic dreams.

A loss would be unacceptable to UMW head John L. Lewis, however. Lewis rallied his remaining supporters by the time the dust settled in the spring and launched a presidential campaign. Although he was a radical and his recent move to be one of the leaders of the recent strikes made him controversial, Lewis had built a great rapport amongst even conservatives in the National Union Party and was thus tentatively accepted as the party's nominee. And even as he chose his agrarian protégé to be his running mate, no splinter ticket or convention walkout materialized. Lindbergh ran an aggressive campaign against Lewis, taunting him as a communist and traitor. The attacks still held water with many Americans. But they wouldn't be enough. Although Lindbergh would pretty handily win the popular vote, he would not win the electoral college.

John L. Lewis entered the White House without a domestic mandate and seemingly surrounded by foreign adversaries. This largely led to his ideological retreat into what was being defined as Modern American Utopianism. Lewis ratcheted up the Dole and even entrusted the nation's social organizations and remnant unions with the increased resources. The American Left's retreat into isolation and syndicalism was strategic on President Lewis' part. He hoped to move fast enough to put his ideological cohort in a position where it could recover and rally in time for the next presidential election, so he could win a proper mandate. This plan of his seemed to be coming together well, at first.

Then, in January 1952, Adolf Hitler died. The resulting market crash sent the global financial system into a tailspin as Hitler's successor, Herman Goring, proved to be incompetent at economic management. Lewis' careful economic recovery vaporized and the country was pushed to the brink. Wanna-be warlords carved out fiefdoms between Chicago and Las Vegas, William Dudley Pelley's Silvershirts overthrew the Governor of North Carolina, and American cities emptied as economic prospects dwindled away. At the 1952 Union Party Convention in Detroit Senator Gerald L. K. Smith accepted his party's nomination to the backdrop of Virgil Effinger's Black Legion, promising to make true on the ideals of Longism and America First. Weeks later, the National Union Convention saw a walkout by the party's conservative and southern wings, backing Ohio Governor Frank Lausche. Although Lewis fought like his political life depended on it, he would be no match for a united Union Party.

President Smith didn't seriously expect to mend the country's wounds by the time he took office. His main goal was maintaining power, however possible. He spent much of his presidency paying off his fellow rightists like Effinger and "Governor" Pelley to harass what he called the "bolshevik and anarchist communities." The President's men did so with glee, enacting terror raids across the country. As he rallied support for downballot candidates during a midterm election whose vote he was suppressing, President Smith would be assassinated by a disgruntled Trotskyite named Lyndon LaRouche.

Unlike his predecessor, former California Governor William E. Riker was product of the new America. Having founded one of the first generation 'Dole Communities' in 1941, through the reincorporation of the former Holy City, California, Riker knew the new system better than any president before him. His encouragement of new settlements and streamlining of the Smith-era 'terror raids' made him the first 'modern' president according to American scholars. His opposition saw the 1956 Election as their last chance to stop him. They received sabotage and bad luck when they needed good fortune. General Eisenhower died of a heart attack, Senator Kennedy got bombed by an anti-Catholic fanatic, Tugwell's technocrats broke-off, then Steinbeck's Socialists, then Fiske's beatniks, and then Lewis' syndicalists. Senator Orson Welles reluctantly took up the mantle of 'main' opposition candidate and after the votes were counted took exile in London. Every candidate would earn a share of the electoral college under the new proportional system, but President Riker would earn the lion's share.

From then on, the rest of the work was housekeeping. 1957's Palisades Treaty between President Riker and Fuhrer Goring established that America would not mess with the Old World, and Germany would not mess with the New World. The 1958 midterms saw the lowest turnout in modern history as the presence of Federal troops and high-profile militias (often called 'staties' by locals due to their association with state governments) at polling locations isolated political opposition and scared off potential voters. Although Riker achieved massive success during his presidency (helped in part by the self-isolation of many of his opponents) he still faced opponents within his governing party. 1960's announcement of the American Party and declaration of hardline-decentralization as 'the new normal' exposed the divisions in the Union Party. California Governor Robert Heinlein led a faction of Unionists making a last-ditch effort at stemming the tide of decentralization across the country and Virginia Senator Harry Byrd led a group of oligarchs fearing for their fortunes in the new America. Byrd severely miscalculated his support across the country and would be forced into exile in 1961 following a targeted corruption investigation and Heinlein's militias were no match for Riker's machine. Heinlein would be jailed following an attempt at secession in 1961.

With the death of Vice President Pelley in early summer, 1964 President Riker became extremely occupied with picking an able successor. His final choice, California Governor L. Ron Hubbard (the man who stuck the knife in the back of Heinlein, his political mentor) would ascend to the presidency following Riker's fatal stroke in late 1966. 1968's elections would be cancelled by President Heinlein as violence across the country crescendoed as a famine began. The United States would continue to unravel under Heinlein and his successor. The ascension of former California Governor Charles Maddox to the presidency after Heinlein's death in January, 1981 would spell the final end of America. Maddox immediately began his rule by executing any potential political opponents en masse. America's rump governance was shattered and by the end of the year Maddox became little more than Bandit King of the country. The death of Herman Goring in 1982 and the subsequent messy multi-factioned nuclear war across Eurasia would spell the end of global commerce. Maddox's Reign would see American communities, whether isolated and united, face down frequent raids from 'staties' and 'feds.' Maddox's death in 2007 would bring about the official end of the United States as his successors squabbled over what was left.

Now the American Warlord Period was to truly begin, and with a unifier waiting in the wings.

 

[Time Enough]

The First Black Ministry (2017-2018)

Prime Minister: Ann Black
Deputy Prime Minister and Secretary of State for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs: Lisa Nandy
Chancellor of the Exchequer: Owen Smith
Secretary of State for Foreign, Commonwealth and Development Affairs: Jeremy Corbyn
Secretary of State for Home Affairs: Katy Clark
Secretary of State for Defence: Dan Jarvis
Leader of the House of Commons: Nick Brown
Secretary of State for Trade and Industry: Ed Miliband
Secretary of State for Education: Nia Griffiths
Secretary of State for Health: Dr Paul Williams
Secretary of State for Energy: Lillian Greenwood
Secretary of State for Employment: Roberta Blackman-Woods
Secretary of State for Transport: Richard Leonard
Secretary of State for Digital, Culture, Media and Sport: Tom Watson
Secretary of State for Housing, Communities and Local Government: Andrew Gwynne
Chief Secretary to the Treasury & the Chancellor of the Duchy of Lancaster: John McDonnell

"The First Black Ministry was one of compromises, Ann Black the fiery Left Wing MP for Oxford East since 1987 had swept into leadership in a reaction to David Miliband's weak leadership in the 2015 election which managed to allow David Cameron to win a slight majority. But following the chaos of the Brexit Referendum (in which Remain won by a slight margin) and the infamous Conservative-UKIP defections in it's wake and the raise of Theresa May to the leadership office the Labour Party managed to go from the sad remains of Blairism to a fiery Left Wing Populist party which managed to scrap together a minority government with support of a confidence and supply deal with Norman Lamb’s Lib Dem’s. Black's Cabinet was created out of a mixture of Shadow Cabinet appointments, New MPs and Left Wing friends of Ann Black, with some appointments like Chancellor of the Exchequer going to Owen Smith as a way to win over support of the Soft Left. Whilst Black was able to bring about a number of Anti-Austerity policies and some Nationalising of Water and Rail it rapidly became clear that the Minority Government was untenable. Black would bring about an election calling for a majority government to bring about 'an actual Left Wing Government', the ensuing 2018 election would be infamous for both it's campaigns and the ensuing chaos that unfolded in the Glasgow attacks and the return of the SNLA as Militant Scottish Nationalism came back onto the table in the wake of Salmond arrests..."

 

[Blackentheborg]

2019-2022: Boris Johnson (Conservative Majority)
defeated Jeremy Corbyn (Labour), Jo Swinson (LibDem), Nicola Sturgeon (SNP), Gerry Adams (Sinn Féin), Jonathan Bartley and Siân Berry (Green), Leanne Wood (Plaid Cymru), others

2022-2027: Priti Patel (Conservative Majority, then minority with Reform-UUP support, then Majority)
defeated Keir Starmer (Labour), Layla Moran (LibDem), Humza Yousaf (SNP), Raheem Kassam (Reform), Steve Aiken (UUP), Jonathan Bartley and Amelia Womack (Green), Mary Lou McDonald (Sinn Fein), Adam Price (Plaid Cymru), others
defeated Rosena Allin-Khan (Labour), Layla Moran (Libdem), Rupert Read (Green), Ajay Jagota (Reform), Colum Eastwood (Réabhlóid), Bethan Sayed (Plaid Cymru), others

2027-2033: James Cleverly (Conservative Majority)
defeated Nadia Whittome (Labour), Layla Moran (LibDem), Raheem Kassam (Reform), Rupert Read (Green), Adam Price (Plaid Cymru), Carl Benjamin (Independents for Britain), Luke Ming Flanagan (Tiocfaidh ár am), others
defeated Nadia Whittome (Labour), Sam Gyimah (LibDem), Noga Levy-Rapoport (Green), Richard Boyd Barrett (Dlúthphartíocht), Rhun ap Iorwerth (Plaid Cymru), Carl Benjamin (Classical Liberal), Luke Akehurst (Reform), others

2033-203?: Ash Sarkar (Independent minority, then Parliamentary Left Alliance)
defeated James Cleverly (Conservative), Nadia Whittome (Labour-LibDem endorsed), Carl Benjamin (Protect Our Values), Noga Levy-Rapoport (Green), Caoimhín McCann (Neamhspleáchas), others

 

[morbidteaparty]

Morbid in Montreal

Lester B. Pearson, Liberal Party (minority), 1963-1968

Robert Winters, Liberal Party, 1968

Robert Stansfield, Progressive Conservative, 1968-1976

Claude Wagner, Progressive Conservative, 1976-1979

John Turner, Liberal Party, 1979-1984

Joe Clark, Progressive Conservative, 1984-

 

[Yokai Man]

1997-2016 Tony Blair (Labour Majority)
1997:Tony Blair-Labour[590],Paddy Ashdown-Liberal Democratic[41]
1997 Scottish Devolution Referendum:75% Yes
1997 Welsh Devolution Referendum:51,81% Yes
2001:Tony Blair-Labour[583],Charles Kennedy-Liberal Democratic[48]
2003 Euro Currency Referendum:51,90 For
2004 North East England Devolution Referendum:52% Yes
2005:Tony Blair-Labour[531],Charles Kennedy-Liberal Democratic[99],Linda Smith-RESPECT[1]
2005 Yorkshire Devolution Referendum:53% Yes
2005 North West Devolution Referendum:52,29% Yes
2009:Tony Blair-Labour[501],Vince Cable-Liberal Democratic[119],George Galloway-RESPECT[1],Nigel Farage-UKIP[1]
2013:Tony Blair-Labour[450],Vince Cable-Liberal Democratic[138],Alec Salmond-SNP[22],Nigel Farage-UKIP[8],George Galloway/Ken Livingstone-BPWP[8], Caroline Lucas-Green[2]
2014 Scottish Independence Referendum:52,81% No

2016-present day Ed Balls (Labour Majority)
2018:Ed Balls-Labour[404],David Laws-Liberal Democratic[151],Nicola Sturgeon-SNP[40],Nigel Farage-UKIP[20],George Galloway/Ken Livingstone-BPWP[8], Steve Hilton/Natalie Bennett-Green[5]

Will do a write up tomorrow.

 

[Yokai Man]

1997-2016 Tony Blair (Labour Majority)
1997:Tony Blair-Labour[590],Paddy Ashdown-Liberal Democratic[41]
1997 Scottish Devolution Referendum:75% Yes
1997 Welsh Devolution Referendum:51,81% Yes
2001:Tony Blair-Labour[583],Charles Kennedy-Liberal Democratic[48]
2003 Euro Currency Referendum:51,90 For
2004 North East England Devolution Referendum:52% Yes
2005:Tony Blair-Labour[531],Charles Kennedy-Liberal Democratic[99],Linda Smith-RESPECT[1]
2005 Yorkshire Devolution Referendum:53% Yes
2005 North West Devolution Referendum:52,29% Yes
2009:Tony Blair-Labour[501],Vince Cable-Liberal Democratic[119],George Galloway-RESPECT[1],Nigel Farage-UKIP[1]
2013:Tony Blair-Labour[450],Vince Cable-Liberal Democratic[138],Alec Salmond-SNP[22],Nigel Farage-UKIP[8],George Galloway/Ken Livingstone-BPWP[8], Caroline Lucas-Green[2]
2014 Scottish Independence Referendum:52,81% No

2016-present day Ed Balls (Labour Majority)
2018:Ed Balls-Labour[404],David Laws-Liberal Democratic[151],Nicola Sturgeon-SNP[40],Nigel Farage-UKIP[20],George Galloway/Ken Livingstone-BPWP[8], Steve Hilton/Natalie Bennett-Green[5]

Will do a write up tomorrow.

The death of the Conservative Party is something historians and political scientists nowadays still have trouble understanding how it happened. Sure,Tony Blair and the Labour Party winning in 1997 was accepted by everyone back then as more or less inevitable. Sure,it was a possibility it might gain the biggest majority in post war history. But no one,not even the most optimistic among Labour’s campaign,could have expected that.

Many moments from that election night have now become firmly ingrained in popular culture: John Redwood’s look and the minutes of silence followed by “...congratulations” that constituted his concession speech,Michael Howard’s loud “HWAT” that he uttered following his defeat by the hands of future LibDem leader David Laws,the hoards of ambulances going towards Conservative Party Headquarters,Iain Duncan Smith’s angry “Betrayal of a Nation” speech-you name them.And of course,John Major’s last speech:”Some here tonight might feel angry by the results and refuse to accept them. Don’t be. That’s just the way life is. It’s not the blame of the electorate. We are to blame and we must learn from this and accept change or go into dustbins of history”.

Those words became unfortunately prophetic for the Conservatives. After 1997,they changed leader after leader,but not the way they operated,becoming stale old men and women,chasing after the glories of the past and living in the Eighties. Even when Thatcher herself became leader of the party (well,what remained of it especially after the numerous splits) in the early 2000’s,people just...stopped caring. About them,about their whole existence. After all,why bother? Labour was now both the main left and right political party. The Conservative Party thus were in some way punished with the worst thing that could happen to a political party: be forgotten. Oh sure,some people still remembered them or showed their angry at them,but they were a small minority that only showed up from time to time. When Thatcher died,only a couple of people even showed up or expressed happiness or sadness that she died. She just didn’t matter anymore.

Some,like Jacob Rees Mogg and his sister,tried to keep the flame on. Others,like John Bercow or Michael Gove,gave up and joined Labour. Others joined the Libdems,UKIP or the Greens. Most of the old guard though gave up. It was Labour’s world now and they just didn’t fit in. People like Portillo,Hague or Clarke preferred doing documentaries for the BBC. After all,why bother? Labour had won and will always win from now on. You can’t change that. Best just to get used to it and move on with life.

And thus the Labour Party had defeated the Tories forever and won more power than any party before it.

And they didn’t know what to do with it.

 

[Tsar of New Zealand]

Mind that swingometer, you'll have someone's eye out


Members of Parliament for Ōhāriu
(previously Onslow (1954 - 1975), Ohariu (1978 - 1993), Ohariu-Belmont (1996 - 2005), and Ōhariu (2008))

1954 - 1960: Henry May (Labour)
1954 def. Wilfred Fortune (National), Barney Daniel (Social Credit)
1957 def. Kevin O'Brien (National), Frederick Buckley (Social Credit)
1960 - 1966: Maida Clark (National)
1960 def. Henry May (Labour), Eric Elliott (Social Credit), Syd Smith (Communist)
1963 def. Keith Spry (Labour), Barney Daniel (Social Credit)
1966 - 1969: Olive Smuts-Kennedy (Labour)
1966 def. Maida Clark (National), Stuart Dickson (Social Credit)
1969 - 1971: Saul Goldsmith (National)
1969 def. Olive Smuts-Kennedy (Labour), Eric Elliott (Social Credit)
1971: Saul Goldsmith (Independent National)
1971 - 1972: Saul Goldsmith (Social Credit)
1972: Saul Goldsmith (New Democratic)
1972 - 1975: Margaret Shields (Labour)
1972 def. Ross Doughty (National), Eric Elliott (Social Credit), Saul Goldsmith (New Democratic)
1975 - 1984: Hugh Templeton (National)
1975 def. Margaret Shields (Labour), Eric Elliott (Social Credit)
1978 def. Helene Ritchie (Labour), Eric Elliott (Social Credit)
1981 def. Neville Pickering (Labour), Eric Elliott (Social Credit)
1984 - 1987: Bob Jones (NZ Party)
1984 def. Hugh Templeton (National), Frank Dunne (Labour)
1987 - 1992: Peter Dunne (Labour)
1987 def. David Lloyd (National), Robert Jones (NZ Party), Bill Campbell (Democrats)
1990 def. George Mathew (National), Keith Locke (Green), Chris Ritchie (NewLabour)
1992: Peter Dunne (Independent)
1992: Peter Dunne (Liberal)
1992 - 1995: Peter Dunne (Alliance)
1993 def. Christine Fletcher (National), Richard Northey (Labour)
1995: Peter Dunne (Centre)
1995 - 2005: Peter Dunne (New Zealand Democratic Coalition)
1996 def. Verna Smith (Labour), Phillda Bunkle (Alliance), Rosemarie Thomas (National), Ken Shirley (ACT), Ernie Davis (NZ First), Jonat Wharton (McGillicuddy Serious)
1999 def. Derek Best (Labour), Kathryn Asare (ACT), Dale Stephens (National), Caron Zillwood (Green)
2002 def. Gill Body-Greer (Labour), Dale Stephens (National), Heather Roy (ACT), Gareth Bodle (Green)
2005 - 2008: Heather Roy (ACT)
2005 def. Peter Dunne (NZDC), Charles Chauvel (Labour), Roland Sapsford (Green)
2008 - 2011: Charles Chauvel (Labour)
2008 def. Heather Roy (ACT), Katrina Shanks (National), Gareth Hughes (Green)
2011 - 2014: Katrina Shanks (National)
2011 def. Charles Chauvel (Labour), Gareth Hughes (Green), Stephen Woodnutt (Conservative)
2014 - 2017: Brett Hudson (National)
2014 def. Charles Chauvel (Labour), Tane Woodley (Green)
2017 - 0000: Virginia Anderson (Labour)
2017 def. Brett Hudson (National), Jessica Doube (Opportunities), Tane Woodley (Green)
2020 candidates: Virginia Andersen (Labour), Brett Hudson (National), Tracey Martin (NZ First), James Shaw (Green), Geoff Simmons (Opportunities), Leighton Baker (New Conservative), Sean Fitzpatrick (ACT)


Possibly the most volatile seat in New Zealand, Ōhāriu has been represented by 12 Members of Parliament from between 10 and 12 parties (depending how you slice independents and MPs who've had the whip removed) over the past seventy years.

After a period as a marginal but otherwise unremarkable seat in northern Wellington which changed hands between Labour and National slightly more frequently than the average, the then-Onslow electorate began its slide into electoral borderline personality disorder with the defection of Saul Goldsmith to Social Credit and then, following arguments with the leadership of a party for whom he was at the time the sole MP, the split-off New Democrats.

For a time, normality seemed to reassert itself as Labour retook the seat in the red wave of '72, before it swung back to National in 1975. Then Rob Muldoon got drunk, a property tycoon dumped a gobsmacking amount of money into the seat, and a three-cornered race brought the NZ Party into Parliament.

While Labour hoped they could count on keeping Wellington's northern flank red, a combination of Rogernomics, the NewLabour Party, and the looming MMP referendum would eventually see their man tear off his rosette and blunder about for three years, wandering into any caucus room that offered something befitting his very specific but somehow extremely vague flavour of bland centrism.

A cosy home in Mike Moore's Democratic Coalition proved just the thing to settle Ohariu-Belmont's appetite for political representation (and came as a relief to local interior decorators, who had quite run out of new colours to offer Mr Dunne for his office), as the advent of MMP had ushered in a bold new era in which an electorate could rake in a great deal of pork by voting for a minor party dependent on a single electorate MP to anchor their party vote on.

The voters of Ōhariu (for lo, there had issued forth from the Electoral Commission yet another renaming) had a good scam going for over a decade, even shifting their negotiable support to the libertarian right when National cut a deal to win a prospective coalition partner a safe seat.

After ACT failed to boost National into Government the voters promptly dumped them to return to Labour, immediately afterwards deserting for National yet again when Helen Clark's successors made it apparent Labour would not bring home the bacon for Ōhāriu in the near future. The National MP, possibly wishing to give the locals a taste of their own medicine, then dumped them after a single term; they dutifully returned her anointed successor as Labour remained unappetisingly distant from actual power, and dutifully ejected him in time to get a Labour MP in a Labour Government.

Which brings us to the 2020 election. In a world full of COVID, Donald Trump, climate change and other uncertainties, one constant remains reassuringly true: the people of Ōhāriu will vote for literally anyone if it means they stay relevant. As Labour looks like it won't actually need the electorate this time, and National appear a losing bet, a raft of minor parties are vying for their own shot at representing the canny and ruthlessly mercenary voters of Ōhāriu.


After all, every other bugger under the sun has had a go.