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AH Run-downs, summaries and general gubbins

napoleon IV

The Spectre of Communism Is A Planet-Sized Ghost
Republic of The Arabian Peninsula, July 2001
Major Parties

Arab Socialist Party: President Yusuf Bitar has won his 3rd term with 89% of the vote. Even more impressively he got more votes from Riyadh then there are voters, and according to rumors even the dead turned out to vote for him.

Party of Law and Justice: I'm not saying that the Party of Law and Justice is a fake political party. I'm just saying that it's interesting that they told their supporters to vote for President Bitar.

Hizb al-Nour: The only legal Islamist party in Arabia, who are currently campaigning to ban cell phones, which they claim are a distraction from studying the Quran.

Illegal Parties and Paramilitary Groups

Muslim Brotherhood of Arabia: Due to years of government crackdowns it's hard to describe the Muslim Brotherhood as active. Most of its leadership is rotting in prison, and remaining members have been driven underground. Despite this, the government still claims they are a major threat.

Asbat al-Ansar: Have claimed responsibility for a car-bombing in Jeddah that left 8 people dead and 15 wounded. This is the worst terrorist attack on the Arab Peninsula since 1993.

Freedom and Democracy Movement: The party has published another manifesto detailing the government's misdeeds. While Amnesty International and other NGOs appreciate the effort the fact is that most Arabians won't be able to read it or even hear of its existence.
One from an old idea of mine

Partee Run Down for the Federayshun ov the Wolds
5th November, sixty fith yeer ov the Wolds Accord

Labour: Justafyin theyr rize in tackses as it has led to a rayse in literacy... in Cester and Strowd. Its ackchuually gon down in other settlmunts such as thows that vote Libdem and Tory
Torys: Criticisin Labour's takses but also sayin not enuf haz been done to adekwatlee trayn milisha and gards along the Suthern. Sayin too many rayders are slippin throo the waystlands of Old Bury's Blite to attack Dur's Ley and Berklee
Libdems: Began listing the policees they will propows as the Libdem Hi Counsillor of Chelt takes up his year term as head of the Cownsil of the Wolds this midwinter. shaym he will still only hav six of the thirtee seets.
Progressivs: Callin for more educatshun and govermunt funds for reserch as they try and bowns bak from their backin the fayled "hot ayr balloon" invention
Holy Leeg: Theyr one Represenativ mostly focusin on how the Progressivs will leed us to damnayshun at a second Lord's wrath. Remynder the Progs have a hole two cownsellors owt of thirtee
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Charles EP M.

Well-known member
Published by SLP
Two Thousand And Eighteen

newingsoc: The bright young things of the Bright New Dawn of '90 are now the old sad bastards, or "Little Cousins" as the samizdats have been dissing them for the last few years. As long as they can keep the rations up and enough of minilov on side, they'll keep power until the internal party elections but they're looking tired. Tired and weak, which is why they're still keeping a lid on the "Tory" uprising in Navalbase One.

doubletrueingsoc: The even older bastards and the more psychotic of the current bright young things, still too strong to crush but too weak to take power yet. The way things are going, their loud bellowing about how great Big Brother was is starting to gain ears. Every "Tory" bombing wins them more converts, to the extent there's (newingsoc-backed) rumours that doubletruingsoc are behind the "Tories". Which means that's probably the pretext of an upcoming crackdown.

unfactioningsoc: What's traditionally the shifting unaligned group, your venal members going with who might win, has started to get a bit organised among themselves. The Thought Police have run a few crackdowns to stop that happening and that seems to have quietened them, but talk's come of meetings in Michigan Metro. This is how '90 got started (as well as the fall of Eurasia).

Proles: The official representatives of the proles are still bought off and compromised, not a thing needed to be concerned about - as long as newingsoc stay in control, that is. Even these fat lazy nothings might do something if doubletrueingsoc will come and take their gravy train away.


'I love the pun he will go far'
Published by SLP
comrad skeltal

2017-2019: Donald Trump (Republican)
2016 (with Mike Pence) def. Hillary Clinton (Democratic)

Trump's presidency was not ended by the Mueller Investigation (though it didn't help). Instead it was the near total collapse of the Veterans' Affairs Department, the emergence of the New Bonus Army and the seeming alignment of powers beyond the ken of mortal man against him. Trump resigned before he could be impeached (or couped), but he claimed he had been pushed and railed against the Deep State and their clear naked allegiance to Satan.

2019-2019: Mike Pence (Republican)

The man who would be king now had to deal with a country and a world seemingly gone mad. He lasted only months in the job before the New Bonus Army marched on Washington once again but not for the payment of their pensions and backpay, but for the institution of Their General, in the Cabinet. With that Pence became virtually irrelevant, and finally resigned in the winter of 2019 frustrated at his impotence, leaving The General to take the highest office in the land.

2019-2024: The Skeleton of Smedley Butler, Somehow Still Tattooed And Held Together With Ethereal Witchfire (Nonpartisan, backed by Democratic Socialists of America, Justice Democrats, Fucken Terrified Dems and GOP and the New Bonus Army)
2020 (with His Own Shinbone, Fuck You) def. haha try it mate

hes come to wreck your shit


The Troika always wins
Lund, DK

Cuban Constitutional Union: They say they are constitutionalists, but sometimes it seems like they refer back to 1876 and not 1925. And it seems that way especially now. The Secretary of the Interior has made some very controversial remarks about how the concentration camps of the 1890s rebellion weren’t really all that bad. That should give plenty of ammunition for the left to rally against while the UCC tries to negotiate a free trade agreement with Washington. Madrid is not too happy about it, but the Liberals govern there so who cares.
Farmers’ and Traders’ Party: Very much on board for agricultural liberalisation, especially if it can be one way. As a lobby party for the big landowners, agribusiness is the business. They don’t love the sucking up to the neo-colonialists as the UCC does, but the agricultural subsidies keep them quiet, for now anyway. Some backbenchers are - quietly - demanding the resignation of the Interior Secretary, so that’s a development.

Official Opposition

Liberal Autonomist Party: The Liberals are outraged. Outraged at the concentration camps, outraged at the deal with the US, and generally at the reversing of their policies. To compensate, the party has - weirdly enough - taken a very anti-autonomist line saying how Santiago needs to follow the steps of Madrid more closely. It’s bizarro world.
Cuban Section of the Spanish Socialist Workers’ Party: Almost beat the Liberals to second place, so they are happy-ish. The Liberals line on following the steps of Madrid has freed territory for them to flirt with more openly pro-independence positions, but from a totally anti-American position, because of course.

Other parties

Cuban Republican Party: Calling for independence is all very good, but the party took a big beating when it was revealed that most of its funding comes from the US. Cubans do not always like Spaniards, but they sure prefer disliking Americans, even if their tourist money is like mana.
Black Party: With a grand total of 3 MPs, the Black Party is euphoric and wants the Cuban and Spanish governments to not only apologise but also compensate Afro-Cubans for the centuries of oppression. It’s all very commendable, but the UCC would rather re-enslave them than do that.
Cuban National Party - Marti Association: Non-American-funded nationalists. After the party split up, they represent the more radical elements.
Cuban National Party - Cespedes Association: Non-American-funded nationalists. After the party split up, they represent the more moderate elements.
Cuban Revolutionary Socialist Party: Compared to peninsular Spain, the Revolutionary Socialists are surprisingly sane. Perhaps it’s because they are a one-family show, as Raul Castro is about to pass the leadership of the party to his son.


Well-known member
My first attempt at one of these, from an electoral-reform thought experiment I've been making a few, as-yet unposted, maps for. President Romney is suffering from the six-year itch and an economy which has just smashed into a brick wall.

State of Pennsylvania, 14th November 2018

The Big Two
Democratic Party of Pennsylvania:
8 congressional gains, five state senate pickups and forty-six state house flips. Landslide victories for senator, governor and all state row offices. The Pennsylvania Dems are understandably almost comatose with joy. Now they just have to govern with a legislative majority ranging from the most rabidly canine of Blue Dogs to the new Democratic Socialists Caucus, in the face of the worst financial crisis since the Great Depression, soaring unemployment rates and a furious and very motivated base. Godspeed, Tom Wolf, godspeed...

Republican Party of Pennsylvania: I know these are meant to be sentences, but the sound and fury coming from the Republicans since the election could have books written about it. Harrisburg has been filled with the sounds of recrimination as the now-powerless Republicans descend into a circular firing squad. If one faction had been disproportionately hurt, perhaps things would have been better, but those who clung to President Romney lost as much as those who pretended they'd never heard of him. Ryan Aument, who lost the 9th District to Jess King without even the need for a recount, has spent the past week ranting on Twitter, blaming a Communist-homosexual conspiracy - so clearly, he really did think he was running for election in the '50s. Meanwhile, Rep. Doug Mastriano, who survived comfortably, has become the first re-elected Republican to call for the resignation, not only of Romney, but also of Vice-President Ryan, so that a 'true conservative' can ascend to the Presidency. For a self-proclaimed constitutionalist, he has a very poor understanding of the Presidential Line of Succession. None of this touches on the ructions in the internal legislative caucuses. Like I said, books and books.

Internal party groupings
Democratic Socialists of Pennsylvania: They've actually managed to get eleven endorsed state reps and two state senators elected, up from the two state reps who joined in the 2016-18 session, and are setting up a caucus. Watch them squander it all come budget time when they try to introduce an amendment nationalising (statalising?) the cannabis industry to go along with liquor control, or something similarly ridiculous.

Pennsylvania Legislative Blue Dog Coalition: Have managed to scrape back a few seats in Pennsyltucky and then proceeded to piss off literally everyone else in the state party by digging up an anti-gay marriage guy to lead them. I'm not saying they're going to do a New York and form the IDC, I'm just saying that they and the state party might be happier if they did.

Pennsylvania Legislative Black Caucus: Wielding increasing amounts of power by continuing to basically control the Philadelphia seats whilst building strength in some really unexpected places (Harrisburg, State College and, of all places, Lancaster now have African American state reps), they have already made it clear that they expect the administration to 'stop taking black votes for granted.' What this actually means is unclear, as the chances of the AA-majority or influenced seats not voting Democratic are pretty minimal, but at least they're trying.

Republican Legislative Mainstreet Partnership: I know I said that people from all branches of the Republican party were hit more-or-less equally, but the Mainstreeters have been decimated as the Democrats swept them out of those increasingly blue Philly suburban districts. There are now no congresspeople from Pennsylvania affiliated with them, either. A poor, poor result for the people that used to dominate Pennsylvania state government.

Legislative Freedom Caucus: Seems to be fragmenting into pro-Mastriano (i.e. pro conspiracy theorist) and anti-Mastriano (i.e. comparatively sensible (what, I did say comparatively)) factions. Almost certainly the anti-Mastriano lot will lose and end up forming a new caucus, but it's just more of the remorseless grind of the PA Republicans destroying themselves. I look forward to seeing whether they manage to leverage their proportionally huge power to get one of their own in the Minority Leader slot, or if it goes to some other kind of extreme rightist.

Minor Parties with at least local representation
Green-Equality Party: The merger of the Greens with that weird Equality League from two years ago, they have, ludicrously, managed to narrowly pick up the 1st council district in Philadelphia in a special election after the Democratic machine failed and two of those defeated in the D primary ran as independents. This led to one of the most bizarre press conferences in recent memory, where the victorious (and visibly high) candidate had to be informed by reporters that she was not, in fact, giving a concession speech but had won. I suspect she's in for a fun year before being turfed out, but it will give them something to put on their website, at least.

Libertarian Party of Pennsylvania: Are circling around the Republican Party like vultures, hoping to pick off a couple of dazed and confused legislators and consume them. To be fair, they might be in with a shot with the few remaining Philly suburban state reps, who are going to be very, very unhappy with whichever far-rightist is elected as Minority Leader by the Pennsyltucky contingent. Didn't win anything on election night, though, apart from a couple of really low-level 'non-partisan' positions which they will nonetheless try to tout as a triumph.

Other Parties
Working Families Party of Pennsylvania: As predicted, a damp squib. Did manage to beat that doomed Republican in Senate District 2, though, so that's something I guess.

Animal Rights Alliance: Their party platform was written entirely in verse, extolling the virtues of veganism, and their spokesperson called the American beef industry 'the Holocowst,' so how well do you think they did?

Pennsylvania Socialist Party: What little campaigning they did seems to have been decrying the DSA endorsed candidates as 'entryists doomed to failure.' Well, there are thirteen DSAers in the legislature now while the Socialist Party managed to get three percent in a Pittsburgh house district, so I guess they have different definitions of failure.

Pennsilfaanisch Deitsch Bund: Beloved of wikibox makers and Amish population growth meme creators, they *checks notes* ran a single candidate, who dropped out and endorsed the Republicans, and remain completely ignored by the vast majority of actual Amish people for the simple reason that they mostly don't vote.
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Only had a few ales officer
New Era - Year 86, The year of the screams on the plains of silence.

Kibbo Kift - Still going strong all this time after the summoning of the elder dark. Matriarch Glenda has still refused to sanction an inquiry into the conduct of the all father lest we draw his wrath upon us. A pity, it would be nice to know just what happened in that field in 'England' while there is still a chance some old records survive.

Sons of Despair - These guys have been through a dozen leaders this year, they still show no signs of running out of meat for the grinder though. Hopefully someone will take off the handle or something because I am sick of cleaning up the chambers.

Woodcraft Folk -
T'Dron'Th the Oak Heart has promised to run a full inquiry into the old times should his party gain mastership of the chambers and the glory of the sceptre. Scratch my previous comments, I'm not sure letting the tree's know about the past is a good idea, I've heard the whispered stories from my great grandfather.

The Skyfather and his Kin -
Wife number 45 is pregnant and this time it will definitely be a boy. The skyfather is hyped.

United Forms of the Colours - If I have my colour map right they are promising full employment and a return to basics. Sounds good.

The Fellowship of Reformed Mankind
- From reading the grapevine these men still haven't managed to quite get the memo that men aren't in charge anymore but you have to give them respect for insisting they can fix everything just the way it was, good luck with that.

The Fellowship of Mankind -
Eric is still going, aged 98 tomorrow.


Well-known member
Languages of Glami Volost

English is the most common language spoken in Glami Volost, with a slim majority of residents speaking it as a native language. Although historically Glami was a Russophone region of Chinukiya, public education and internal migration have led to English becoming dominant, especially in the city of Beringgrad. Nearly all Glami residents speak English either as a first or second language.

Chinukiya Russian is the second most common language. Before the annexation of Chinukiya, Glami had a small population of Russophone farmers, miners, and loggers of Russian, Polish, Finnish, and Jewish heritage. Over time, the local English and Chinukiyan influenced Russian dialect came to dominate the farming regions of the volost, especially in the hyper-conservative town of Tsaryovo. Despite this, the language has been in decline across the volost since the middle of the 20th century, with few young Russian Americans speaking it fluently.

Glami is the native language of the indigenous Glami peoples. Although modern anthropologists question the validity of the Glami supra-group, it has become a strong source of identity for indigenous residents of Glami Volost. Despite this, the language is virtually moribund. Revival attempts have been inhibited by lack of federal recognition, though the tribal Orthodox churches have spearheaded efforts of late and basic courses are now offered in Glami at Kulshan Community College.

Spanish is the third most spoken language in Glami Volost. While many of the the large population of rural and urban migrant laborers from California, Mexico and Central America are not native Spanish speakers, it serves as an effective lingua franca. It is the language of the construction business and the most common foreign language studied by Glami Volost residents.

Chinese is the fastest growing language in Glami Volost. The opening up of the Heavenly Kingdom in the past thirty years has brought many businessmen and missionaries to the West Coast, though peripheral Beringgrad has not been a primary destination. In 2013, Glami Volost got its first Chinese restaurant, Heaven's Gate, located near the industrial district by downtown Beringgrad.

Korean has a long history in Glami Volost, dating back all the way to the first Korean settlers which were conscripted as laborers by the Tsarist regime. Centered around two prominent Buddhist temples, Koreatown remains a small but lively part of Beringgrad, though increasingly populated by Anglophone hipsters.

German has grown in recent years, especially since the collapse of the People's Republic of Germany. As a non-visible minority, ethnic Germans mostly blend in with the Anglophone and Russophone populations. There are two German Baptist churches in Glami Volost, and a popular German beer garden in downtown Beringgrad.

Javanese speakers are a very small minority in Glami Volost, though few have assimilated. They have found their economic niche as gas station clerks and bus drivers. After popularizing soto across the West Coast, many Javanese refugees and their descendants have taken to starting soto restaurants including a handful in Glami Volost.

Sinhala has few native speakers in Glami Volost, though it historically had a significant presence. The 1897 riots destroyed the historic community of Sri Lankan saw mill workers. In 2007, to mark the one-hundredth-tenth anniversary, Mayor Natalie Poklonskaya issued an official apology to the Sri Lankan people and a small memorial was constructed on the waterfront.

Charles EP M.

Well-known member
Published by SLP
Labour: The ongoing war between the pro-euros and the ex-euros is not actually responsible for the pension debacle, let's be clear on this, this is a civil service corruption issue that the Pensions Minister missed. However, people believe it's responsible and that's what's important for January's Home Rule elections. Expect for Senator McDonnell to publicly be all chummy with the PM to fake out there's no real conflict and for people on both sides to brief the press over & over. (It's not like we're even going to change our status with the United Nations of Europe to begin with, so this fight doesn't even mean anything!)

Liberals: Leo Varadkar is the shiny new thing, a gay mixed-race under-40s man who smokes puff and can wear a suit, he is exactly what the Liberals need to stop being your dad's party and be at least your older brother's party. Add his sparkle to Labour's woes and the Liberals are going to clean up the Home Rule votes, which means they're probably going to win Westminster in two years. Who though the Libs would be back so soon? Who made Leo's teeth so shiny?

Family of the Nation:
They were really, really hoping the Libs wouldn't be back so soon and they could finally make it to government. Rees-Mogg's 'daffy loveable toff' schtick just can't compete and he's starting to turn nasty now it isn't, which is just hurting them more. However, the Welsh Family are doing quite well with their populist appeals to socially conservative working-class and expect them to win in Home Rule. And once that happens, expect Rees-Mogg to get nastier.

Sinn Fein: Also making hay of your gran's lost pensions, these guys! They're still reeling from 2013's lost independence referendum but they're expecting to claw their way into second-place and Ireland's official opposition at Labour's expense. Maria Mosley continues to be the leader that shouldn't, Irish gentry and granddaughter of Family's co-founder in the populist nationalist party, and will be getting "should she be here" mutterings even if she does, by miracle of God, lead them back to government.