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AH Run-downs, summaries and general gubbins


Rootless Rōnin
Logical, unlike those in German

The Greycoat Election of 1896:

"The Imperial Government" (Kejserliga regeringen):
It’s been over three years since the Bohemian Revolutionary War broke out, and not a single soldier, Prussian, Austrian, Bohemian, or any other kind as far as that is concerned, has entered into Nordic territory. Still, much to the opposition’s amazement and despair, no cracks have yet appeared in the Preparedness Ministry, which remains firmly united and closes ranks.

The Skeptical Party: Despite only leading the second largest party in the ruling composition government, Bille-Brahe’s position as Chancery President remains insurmountable, being the only individual capable to bridging Unionists and pro-Conscription Liberals. In his own party, the only talent that could truly rival him is the chief whip of the government, Erik Sparre, a moot point, seeing their alliance are as hewn in granite. Still, rumours are afloat that Bille-Brahe's coupon scheme for the upcoming election might just be the first step for a more permanent alliance of parties, if not an outright merger. Nothing is official, of course. Nothing can be traced back to Bille-Brahe personally. But if you know one thing about Bille-Brahe, it is that such rumours would never be allowed to even spontaneously come about, let alone persist, without his tacit approval at some point. And to most senior Skepticals, such a notion appears about as palatable as arsenic, which I understand is not only poisonous, but also tastes pretty foul.

The Unionist Party: Poor Ulrik Lundeborg was going to revive the fortunes of the Unionists after Robert Falkvinge's catastrophic showing in 1881, and become Chancery President. Yet he has been sidelined and bullied relentlessly by Bille-Brahe, becoming his lapdog. Though he technically holds the prestigeous cabinet portfolio of President of the Treasury, the extent to which he actually gets to set economic policy is debated, with some officials within the College regarding him as a mere functionary, if not an outright figurehead. Sure, as long as the War of the Bohemian Revolutionary continues and it might yet come to war, Lundeborg retains a firm grip on the poisoned chalice that is the Unionist leadership, and the stability of the government remains unthreatened. But everyone from the traditionalist Unionist grandees and donors at the Tricorne Club to the young reformist Young Turk faction (‘ungtupparna’) of the Unionists in Stockholm are gearing themselves up for the inevitable.

The Liberal Conscription League: To think that Mattias Alexander von Ungern-Sternberg was once Sønderheim’s closest political ally! His lieutenant, his advisor, his protégé, his dauphin and heir! The Grand Old Fart himself once compared the two of them to Elijah and Elisha! But that was before the young Swedish nobleman broke with his Norwegian commoner mentor and benefactor on the issue of conscription, and took a chunk of Swedish and Danish Liberals with him, to join in the cabinet of the hated Bille-Brahe. Still, some respect has to be afforded to the pro-conscription Liberals, who so far have managed to assert themselves in government far more effectively than the Unionists, and von Ungern-Sternberg got to keep his portfolio as Union Minister for Foreign Affairs as a reward for his treason. It has first been in the past six months that the Liberal Conscription League was hastily cobbled together as the North head to the ballot box once again (indeed, nobody expected the crisis to last as long as it has), and had it not been for Bille-Brahe’s coupon scheme whereby the government will only field a single candidate in every single-member constituency, most LCL members of the Unionsdag would likely lose their seats. They might yet suffer backlashes from their constituents. Ungern-Sternberg and the other pro-conscription Liberals in the cabinet have yet to officially repudiate their long held line that they intend to return to the Liberals proper once the crisis is over. Whether Sønderheim would be amenable to welcoming them back, of course, remains to be seen.

The Patriotic Radical Party: It had hardly been a year since the Reform Unionists, the Radical Liberals, and Radikale Højre joined forces when the current crisis broke out. And Hasselqvist, former leader of the Reform Unionists and the leader of the new Radical Party front wasted no time in taking a strong stand for conscription, much alienating the sensibilities of the new party he had just helped found. When the party congress voted down his appeal for the Fatherland, he angrily resigned his membership and formed the Patriotic Radical Party, whom Bille-Brahe was only happy to do business with. It is unclear what will happen to Hasselqvist, let alone his party, once the crisis comes to an end. Indeed, even with the coupon scheme, many political observers doubt he will keep his seat.

The Nationalist Party: For all intents and purposes, this party exists only as a vehicle for Bille-Brahe to shore up support among a constituency that never would have voted Skeptical otherwise. It’s leader is a disgraced, dishonourable discharged, officer in the Imperial Nordic Army, of whom the less is said, the better.

Supporting the government:

Basically the party of wealthy German landowners in Slesvig, Holsten, and Lauenborg. They threw their weight behind Nicolas Andersen back in the day, but once the 1880s rolled around made their shift to mainly supporting the Skepticals under Bille-Brahe. Though they certainly have Bille-Brahe’s ear, and Bille-Brahe has frequently referred to their prominent Members of the Unionsdag as great men, the symbiotic relationship does not extend to a formal alliance. The Lantmannspartei is not represented in the cabinet, and does not take part in the coupon scheme (though of course, the government isn’t fielding candidates in the Duchies).

Pommersche Patriotenpartei: The party of nigh-perpetual government in Pomerania has very limited interest in seeing their Duchy overrun by Prussian soldiers any time soon, and as such have pledged their support for conscription, and by extension, the government. Though the particular international situation is such that it has encouraged the Patriotenpartei and the Landmannspartei into greater parliamentary cooperation in the Unionsdag, this should not be interpreted that the two parties are eyeing a merger any time soon. For starters, suffrage in Pomerania is wider than that in Slesvig, Holsten, and Lauenborg, and the two parties generally rely upon different sets of voters to support it, the Patriotenpartei growing increasingly urban in every election, and the Landmannspartei, as the name implies, relying almost exclusively on a rural electorate. That said, if the past few years have taught the two parties anything, it is that if they play their cards right, German Scandinavians can easily amass greater influence in the Unionsdag than their numbers would suggest.

The Opposition:

The Liberal Party:
The development of the Liberal Party over the past thirty years is one great irony. They took a lot longer to form as a united party on a federal level than the Unionists and the Skepticals, and have generally opposed further concentration of political power to federal level since 1867. Still, internally, their leadership on federal level today is the single most centralized creature ever witnessed in Nordic politics. Asbjørn Abraham Sønderheim, who once would complain about how Cap policy and strategy was being dictated “by a few artistocratic Swedish grandees in the Phrygian Club” now wields far greater power than they ever could dream of. He reigns supreme, having led his party since the mid-70s. His lieutenants have been battled-hardened by two great internal struggles leading to very painful splits. Loyalty is valued above all else, and on the Grand Old Fart’s mere say-so, candidates can be named and deselected by the party in every constituency. He celebrated his eighty-fifth birthday just earlier this year, yet he has the energy and mental clarity of a man fifty years his junior, and the bitterness and spite of a man five hundred years’ his senior. He is determined to defeat what he calls “Bille-Brahe’s grotesque hydra”.

The Radical Party: The split provoked by Hasselqvist’s departure is still deeply felt. Old Baron Cohen-Brandes, Nicolas Andersen’s old radical Treasury President in the 60s and 70s, who did much to encourage the formation of the party, has been courted rather aggressively for weeks now to agree to leave retirement and lead their few MPs and candidates into the election. It remains to be seen if another couple of fine dinners at Copenhagen’s fanciest restaurants might persuade him to throw his hat back in the ring. Talks about fielding joint candidates with the Liberals to form a united front against the government in the upcoming elections broke down before they even started. Sønderheim plainly will not tolerate any alliance with what he calls “elements of questionable allegiance”.

The Lavender List: Of the four women that currently serve in the Folketing, the Lavender List accounts for, well, all of them. They have started to become somewhat concerned lately about the Committee of Secrets appointing a subcommittee to look into whether or not it is feasible to start conscripting women for work with maintaining the supply lines and in various clerical posts. Their concerns are mainly over whether or not this will legally be deemed service in the armed forces, though, as current Nordic law stipulates that anyone who serves in the armed forces for more than three hundred and sixty-five days gets the vote.

The Labour Party: The party’s sole MP, Hakon Kirstein from Malmö, has signalled that he will support conscription on the condition that full universal suffrage for men is introduced. Since the government already has a majority without him, they have elected not to pay him any attention. Since he has theoretically indicated a willingness to work with the government, the Liberals deem him an “element of questionable allegiance”. The Lavender List feel that while suffrage certainly should be extended for women in the propertied classes, the idea of extending it to working class men is not in keeping with good statesmanship. The Radicals have elected not to field any candidates in Malmö, however, so as to help Kirstein’s chances of being re-elected.

The Loke Fagerlund Party: Loke Fagerlund of Jerrestad and Albo left the Liberals in 1890 when Sønderheim, then still Chancery President, introduced a small levy on homebrew, and in doing so, he took his entire constituency party with him. He concurrently serves as Chieftain of the Hundred in both Jerrestad and Albo, though he deputizes the two posts to his two eldest sons Lars and Leif. He feels strongly that all this talk about the war on the continent and conscription have obscured the real important issues in this election, namely tax rebates for cider orchards and pig farms, and the quality of the gravel used on roads in Southeast Scania.
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couboi suet
Little Beirut
All Yesterday's Parties

Federalist: Don’t forget, it’s seditious to say that half the Panic of 2019 Recovery Fund went to the Speaker’s friends in the Caribbean territories. Be a good patriot, avoid declarative statements. Phrase it in the form of a question: “The way the Panic of 2019 Recovery Fund was disbursed in the form of private subsidies, in tandem with the sale of territorial institutions, vastly enriched a small ruling minority in Puerto Rico, including Speaker Miranda’s friends, didn’t it?”

Republican: For once the Natural Party of Opposition is reading the national mood, but let’s not give them too much credit: the national mood is at about a second-grade reading level right now. An American outcry of “leave us alone and give us our money back” is Easy Mode for the Republicans, and it’s almost unfair that they have a literal yeoman farmer leading them too: Joel Salatin’s equally comfortable talking kosmically responsible agriculture with liberal-minded urbanites, or waxing romantic about plantation life for the party base. Sure, it’s intentionally alienating the African vote, but they weren’t going to go Republican anyway. Getting the votes won’t be a problem – the issue will be building a Congressional coalition once all that careful alienating is done.

People’s: Splitting along all the old racial and landowners-versus-farmworkers lines over whether or not it can stomach serving as Salatin’s coalition partner. Still no chance of a formal party dissolution IMO, if only because all the remaining farmowner representatives are probably going to lose their seats and the Chavistas will finally have the party to themselves.
Labor: Randy Bryce remains the most popular man in American politics, which might mean something if he wasn’t leading a party representing the vanishing demographic of small-city manufacturing workers, and if most of his good polling didn’t come from people who like seeing him on the zoetrope but are neither able nor willing to vote for a subordinate party that only competes in like five states.​
Silver Republican: Romanoff’s opposing a proposed gold mine in Alyeska on kosmological grounds, which gives the comical headline writers two entirely different obvious jokes to make.​
Silver: Another electoral cycle, another massive corruption scandal out of the Nevada franchise dragging on the rest of the Alliance.​
Anti-Monopoly/Greenback: Getting cranky at the People’s Party for not making this Modern Monetary stuff the core issue of the Alliance’s campaign. Supposedly Romero asked them to explain it in five words before she’d put it in the ads, and they’re still working on it.​
Whig: Still vomiting up black crepe and dead flowers for President McCain in the broadsheets how many years later? Just don’t mention how little of their platform he actually supported. Like the rest of us, the Whigs like to pretend their Presidents are just patriotic statuary.
Opposition, Union, Constitutional Union, Unconditional Union: I am finally abandoning my mini-rundown of the Whig franchises, because it’s always the same depressing nonsense. Oh look, Amy McGrath is getting the red carpet treatment from the national party right after calling the Knights of the Golden Circle “misguided.” Can’t even make that funny.​
American: Know Nothing chief Joey Gibson was arrested for assaulting a Sumatran refugee last week. He’s claiming that the victim just happened to get in the way while he was trying to punch a Wide Awake provocateur. Even disregarding the fact that there’s zoetropic evidence to the contrary, the brazenness of the supposedly secret militia accusing the one that marches openly in capes of having a network of undercover subversives never fails to impress. Neither does Michelle Fiore still pretending that her party doesn’t have a paramilitary wing.

Socialist: Okay, the term has a storied history, and Ramirez-Rosa’s overhaul of the Chicago utilities has been a huge selling point for the party, but I think the proposed logo with roses growing out of a sewer deserves all the shit it’s been getting. No pun intended.
American Labor: The unfair claim that all their representatives are secret members of the Communist Party is making the rounds again. It’s not true. Some of them are secret members of the Communist Workers Party.​
Southern Rights: Using the collapse of the Miranda administration to call for more white settlement in the Caribbean territories before statehood. Of course, more white settlement has been their answer to every colonial issue for a long time, so they’re lucky that their monotonous hatred is relevant to the national discourse this time.
Nullifier: Joe Wilson is apologizing again, this time for saying one of his electoral opponents had “the forehead of a born criminal.”​
Readjuster: All the Northern editorial hyperventilators need to pick up a history book – Ojeda is neither a dictator in waiting nor a white chauvinist taking over an interracial organization, he’s just the latest charismatic veteran the party’s put up to ensure their white voters don’t get scared off by what the local leaders like khalid are up to.

Anti-Masonic: Good news for once – the name change is probably dead, with Zuckerman now calling it a distraction the party doesn’t need this close to the election. Now we get to watch another electoral season of earnest young canvassers trying to explain that “Anti-Masonic” is just an analogy for opposing capitalists and kosmical polluters, only to be undermined by Ernie Chambers insisting that the Masons really do run Washington.

Free Soil: Usually the excuse is the plausible “we support the Federalists because the official opposition are bigots” but this time they just dropped the mask and went with “we voted against the no-confidence motion because Miranda was planning on passing some union busting laws.” I guess the party of starchy Puritanism can’t bring itself to lie, even at election time.
Anti-Nebraska: Saw some good party registration numbers this year thanks to Iowa Hawkeyes fans buying each other membership cards as gag gifts.​
Farmer—Labor: Ilhan Omar and Abdul El-Sayed are both “open” to supporting the Republicans in return for a vote on withdrawal from Veracruz. The broadsheets helpfully remind us that this is sedition.

Progressive: Still trying to square their crusade against antitrust violations by the difference engine industry with the fact that most of their voters are the kind of technocrat intellectuals who have made a lot of money off antitrust violations by the difference engine industry.

Liberal Republican: I’ll admit, I still do read his columns in the broadsheets because his contrarianism can be interesting, but I’ve lost a lot of respect for Glenn Greenwald now that he’s so clearly taking a little corruption and hypocrisy more seriously than racist violence.

Libertarian: Desperately flailing for something to differentiate themselves from the Republicans. Synthopium legalization? Trimetallism? Bring back slavery?

Liberal: For Ruben Diaz, Jr., every day on the Hill must be like being escorted to prom by your father and having him hit on all your friends. (In this analogy, “prom” is “prospective coalition politics,” and “hitting on your friends” is “trying to sell your crooked machine microparty to whoever will crack down on homophile bathhouses.”)

National Republican: Party assets currently in litigation between estranged cousins John D. and Samuel A. Adams.

: The radical centrists’ Constitutional proposals are always good for a laugh. No at-large seats! A cap on the size of the House! A strong Presidency!

Prohibition: Jack Thompson is being sued for slander by the Barnum Entertainment Company and has decided to represent himself. Please, voters, preserve this perennial comedy asset through the next election.

Conservative: Approaching the inevitable singularity of pointyheaded intellectualism where every single one of their voters will be a columnist at their affiliated newsmagazine.

Connecticut for Lieberman: Matt Lieberman is being challenged for renomination! In his father’s own party! By someone whose name isn’t Lieberman! Wouldn’t it be so ironic, so worthy of constant remark, if the Connecticut for Lieberman Party ended up running against

(outgoing gov't: Federalist-Whig-Free Soil-Progressive-Liberal-CfL)


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Published by SLP
Western New York
My latest silly project is a list of Popes where the Avignon Papacy lasts ~250 years longer. I finished the Avignon and Return to Rome side of things and might carry on the Avignon antipopes to a sad sack Michael of Kansas conclusion. There's a very faint chance I'll do an AH vignette in the Avignon side of this setting. What do you, the readers at home, think?

Urban V 1362-1370 Guillaume de Grimoard
Urban VI 1370-1401
Benedict XIII 1401-1423
Clement VII 1423-1446
Urban VII 1446-1463
Clement VIII 1480
Clement IX 1492
Benedict XIV 1517
Felix V 1531
Pius II 1536
Pius III 1550
Felix VI 1562
Sixtus IV 1585
Julius II 1599
Julius III 1623
Augustine I 1625
Augustine II 1640
Leo X 1649
Linus II 1659 (return to Rome)
Julius IV 1681
Adrian VI 1699
Leo XI 1721
Clement X 1732
Clement XI 1746
Pius IV 1758
Gregory XIII 1774
Augustine III 1793
Linus III 1805
Pius V 1828
Gregory XIV 1847
Leo XII 1880
Linus IV 1892
Gregory XV 1907
Clement XII 1925
Innocent VIII 1943
Ambrose I 1958
Augustine IV 1978
Innocent IX 1983
Alexander VI 1999
Linus V 2012
Ambrose II incumbent

Charles EP M.

Well-known member
Published by SLP
Royal Advanced Tactical Police

Introduced in the early 1980s in response to the rising crime rates and riots, not to mention the need to use the SAS in the Iranian embassy siege, the RATP (swiftly nicknamed "the Rats", with the RATP nicknaming themselves "the Rat Pack" or "Sinatras" as a result) were intended to fill in a perceived gap. While the bobbies on the beat would remain unarmed, the new national gendarmerie would wear riot gear as standard and be armed with shields, tear gas, and assault rifles as standard. Dedicated brances were established in seven cities, along with eight regional 'flying squads', under the command of a Chief Constable headquartered in Liverpool: a decision made as a gesture towards the recent Toxteth Riots.

For the most part, the RATP - after an early surge in raids and a famous 'baptism of fire' - were deliberately sidelined by the existing city police services, who would rather handle their own sieges and armed responses. The RATP would primarily see use in dealing with riots, which the Met and others were quite happy to outsource, and became celebrated and loathed in equal measure. Football hooliganism was pretty heavily squashed when 'firms' feared the Rats would come pouring out of their famous blue-and-grey vans.

The RATP became infamous in the late 1980s for two uses. First, Thatcher opened branches in Belfast, Londonderry, and Amargh, in order to withdraw some of the soldiers that were controversially patrolling the streets. These branches were half Northern Irish recruits and half existing RATP on a tour of duty, and the two halves suffered a major culture clash and often failed to cooperate with each other, leading to incoherence on the ground - the locals could not tell in any encounter how they'd be treated or what the officers were after. Back on the mainland, the RATP was stretched to its limits by the miner's strike and crackdowns on violent protests; now, for many Britons, instead of dealing with young tearaways, hooligans, and commie weirdos, the Rats were beating up good honest decent folk.

Recruitment plummetted as a direct result of these deployments and standards were 'relaxed' to keep numbers up. Several embarrassing events in the early 1990s caused John Major to launch a major purge of leadership and reorganisation of the force, shutting and merging several branches; heavier training was brought in for the Northern Irish branches to better integrate the locals with the seconded men. The RATP would also be sent to Bosnia after the war as part of the UN policing mission, with the government promoting this as part of the future of the force.

New Labour disagreed: scrapping the RATP had been a demand from the party's members since 1983 (when it had also been a Foot pledge) and the reorganisation was not good enough for them. Outside of Bosnia and Northern Ireland, the force was shut down - and with the formal introduction of the Police Service of Northern Ireland, it ceased to exist in Belfast as well.

A new RATP was almost brought in after the 2011 riots but blocked by the Liberal Democrats. While it remained a Conservative election pledge in 2015, they never got round to it and "a new RATP" remains, for now, akin to "bring back hanging" and "send them on national service".

Time Enough

"Enthusiastic Cis Male Partner"
Labour Party Factions, 2020 (Some Sort of Gouldverse):

Political Faction:Ideologies:Prominent Figures (Still Living):
Radical Gouldites:
The 'Left' of the Gouldite Strain, taking the Socialist part of Market Socialism. Originally starting out as members of Ken Livingstone's Democratic Left Group the organisation carried on post Livingstone's 1997 Leadership Bid under the firm hand of John McDonnell. The group gained prominence in the aftermath of the Dot Com. Crash of the Early 10s and have managed to get various positions in the cabinet.

The current leaders would probably be Faiza Shaheen (Chief Treasury Secretary) and Ed Miliband (Secretary for Business, Energy and Industrial Strategy).
Democratic Socialism, Decentralisation, Eco-Socialism, Soft Euroscepticism, Left Wing Populism, Democratic Confedralism (Minority), Alter-globalisation (Minority), Economic Nationalism (Minority)John McDonnell, Alan Simpson, Rachel Maskell, Lynne Jones, Ed Miliband, Clive Lewis, Faiza Shaheen, Monica Lennon
Fundamentalist Gouldites:
The 'Right' of the Gouldite Strain, rather more interested in the Market side of Market Socialism. They believe prominently in not altering the Anglo-Model set up by Bryan Gould in the 1990s though unlike the Radical Gouldities they believe in taking more part with the EU (to a point) and funding more of the growing British Creative Industry to.

Currently the dominant strain in the Labour party under the leadership of Lisa Nandy.
Market Socialism, Decentralisation, Anglo-Model, Economic Nationalism, Industrial Democracy, Social Democracy (Minority), Soft Euroscepticism (Minority)Bryan Gould, Jon Cruddas, Lisa Nandy, Annaliese Dodds, Cat Smith, Mark Seddon, Bill Morris, Peter Hain, Owen Jones, Richard Leonard
Tribunites (Beckettites):
The European Social Democrats of the Labour Party, following Bryan Gould's Premiership, Margaret Beckett would takeover. Changing very little in her time in office she did ensure that the Gould Consensus would stick within the British psyche. Her organisation would takeover the Tribune during the 00s and would influence the papers direction in the years to come.

Could be considered the Centre of the Labour Party and does mainly follow the party line, though Angela Rayner (Justice Secretary) and Katy Clark (Scottish Secretary) seem to be willing to push there factions envelope forward.
Social Democracy, Centralisation, Nordic Model, Pro-Europeanism, Keynesian Economics (Minority), Democratic Socialism (Minority)Margaret Beckett, Paddy Tipping, Paul Boateng, Angela Rayner, Diane Abbott, Katy Clark, Hilary Benn
The Hard Right of the Labour Party, a gaggle of Third Wayers and Neoliberals who believe that the Gould consensus should be dismantled similar to Thatcherism. Not very popular and were depleted after Blair defected to the Liberal Democrats, it mainly spends it's time being intellectual and ensuring the flame of the Third Way stays lit.

Has the most amount of say within the Scottish Labour Party.
Social Democracy, Centralisation, Third Way, Pro-EuropeanismGordon Brown, Jack Straw, Ian Murray, Emily Benn
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Well-known member
North Campus, Austin, Texas
¡Adelante, Hispania!

Alianza Socialista y Democrática: Roberto Lavagna went on Teleglobo to talk shit about Bachelet's deficit spending and response to student protests. This naturally translated to a billion Sonico posts saying that this will finally, finally, be the thing that breaks the XXIth Century ASD hegemony, sends Bachelet back to Chile, and returns the PPU to its natural place in government. Meanwhile, in real life, the ASD deputies remember that Lavagna's been talking shit about every ASD leader since Cárdenas.

Partido Popular Unificado: Hey, everyone, Soraya Sáenz de Santamaría is so great! She's on all the news shows, and doing so much #girlpower stuff in the Cortes, and negotiating peace in Dixie, and people seem to like her vision for a new conservatism based on expertise and meritocracy, and nobody cares because Uribe just got arrested by the AFI and that's opening up a whole lotta wounds.

Nuestro Movimiento: I'll never forgive AMLO for not just up and calling it "Alianza Moderna Laborista de Obreras" or whatever. We should be honest with each other and ourselves.

Partido Nuevo: At least Newsom doesn't pretend it's anything more than his party. It's real fun to watch all the wacko oligarchs under him, Musk and Thiel and the like, sharpen their knives when we all know that Slim Helú is going to drop the party like a hot potato the moment it starts getting weird.

Concertación Cristiano y Antirrevolucionario: Responding to Uribe being arrested in a very normal way, with a combination of weird conspiracy theories and blatant sexism about Bachelet and 3S. Rafael Cruz, who is ostensibly their leader, was also there, and why not?

Partido de Trabajadores Comunistas: Another "minor fluff" where Dr. Guevara started talking about Fujimori and it took a full minute for his handlers to figure out he wasn't talking about Keiko. A week ago he was talking about Aramburu like he was still in office. I don't have anything funny to say about that.

Liberación: RIP Felipe Quispe, who died yesterday from cardiac arrest. With Moto and Sáenz Vargas now pretty firmly retired, Guillén now doing whatever the hell he's up to, and Gus Envela Jr. now in the catbird seat, leadership of Liberación has passed, once and for all, from the militant leaders to a new generation, mostly comprised of LARPers.

Anglophone Alliance: One of their state deputies in Coahuila y Tejas accidentally sexted an El Tiempo reporter, claimed it was meant for his wife, and then got caught having an affair with a different El Tiempo reporter; another got caught with a gun in the State Capitol when it fell out of the holster and down his pant leg. Rick Perry sure is setting the tone for his party, but on the other hand he can believably claim not to remember any of these people.


Hello to our posters from NooOOORTH CAR-O-LIN-A
Sandford, Gloucestershire
Party Rundown as the start of Ready for Government

How is Sideways so brief about this

Government Parties:
Liberal Democrats:
The Prime Minister continues his ascension to becoming a being of pure smug as the Lib Dems push for elected Lords and STV for the Commons as well as referenda on English devo that will probably lead to some awkward rump English parliament. Also a return to the ECHR but they were going to do that anyway
Labour: Labour’s “Moderate path” continues by *checks notes* forcing through English Devolution regardless of public desite. Presumably Burnham is trying to consolidate Labour’s strongholds before abandoning ship.

Conservatives: putting a lot of hope in the 100 randomly selected public delegates. Maybe hoping they’ll be instinctively conservative and vote for what they know
Greens: Natalie Bennett is also practicing her signature “Natalie Bennett MP” just in case and continually mapping out a Traffic Light Coalition.
UKIP: Nige being one of the few MPs to also be a CCD. Was surprised he didn’t keep at being an MEP too.

National Parties
Plaid Cymru: Leanne Wood is practicing her signature “Leanne Wood, aelod o senedd Cymru”
DUP: Is scared. They don’t like change.
SF: Sending delegates to the Constitutional Convention but only voting on Good friday related stuff.
Alliance: Naomi Long probably sick of “the Nick Clegg of Northern Ireland” title by now

Parties Not in Commons but sending delegates
Actually breaking with the Tories over electoral reform because they desperate to get an MP again!
SDLP: … actually agreeing with the UUP on a few things, interesting times.
Socialist Coalition: Dave Nellis awkwardly backing some of Labour’s policies like a co worker you used to date.
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All he has managed to do is make himself sad
A continuation of a series of vaguely connected wikiboxes, based on some ideas I've been toying around with. My sincere apologies to any french forum members, or anyone with a basic understanding of French politics for that matter. While I concede that it wouldn't be anything less than I deserve it's probably not worth the potential legal issues to beat me to death. I'm also tall and really heavy, so getting rid of the body would be an issue.

The State of the Republic, January 2018

Mouvement des citoyens:
Yes, I always say that President Mélenchon is a bad afternoon away from dismissing the government, but it's still true! The only reason it hasn't happened yet is that Prime Minister Laurent controls enough of the party machinery that it would cost him his majority, so now we're stuck with the two most powerful men in the country pretending they don't want to kill each other as they raise the child allowance and wait it out for the inevitable showdown in 2021. At least Mélenchon got to call Chancellor Hauk a cuck (if not in so many words) at the latest Council meeting.

Union pour la démocratie française: For the first time since the election (and to be honest, since President de Sarnez's retirement) they have all their ducks in order, with no party or faction threatening to run away or airing their dirty laundry for the press. This should be unequivocally good news, but it also means no one pays them any attention. Yes, you could read about Jégo's very sensible critique of the new labour code reform, but wouldn't you rather hear about how the President allegedly called his own Prime Minister a traitor (among other things) again?

Mouvement pour une république sociale: Bruno Retailleau is starting to realize that there might be downsides of uniting the respectable non-UDF right and revitalizing Gaullism as a serious independent force. Like getting a party group that goes from people who will serve in the next center-right government to deputies who would sit with FN and the identitarians if they were just a wee bit less fascist.

Union progressiste
-Les Verts:
I know the ecologist voters were the driving force behind most-to-all of the unions electoral successes, and that it's really unfair how the Socialists have managed to dominate both the parliamentary group and what shared bureaucracy you have, but you really should've thought of that before you married your political project to people with a century of experience when it comes to procedural fuckery. Yannick Jadot is doing a reasonably good job at the Ministry of Ecological Transformation, at least.
-Parti socialiste: Harmon has in the last months hinted that he will resign from the government, that he will challenge Delphine Batho for the First Secretaryship and that he will defect to the RDG (or possibly start his own thing). It's one way to get your name out, but I'm not sure it will work in the way he might hope.
-Parti des radicaux de gauche - Mouvement Marianne: While I think that their insistence that their adoption of UBI as their key policy was what paved the way for their relative resurgence back in 2016 is confusing correlation with causation I appreciate that they're 1) focusing on the issues and 2) appears to have a good time, which is more than I can say about some other people.

Parti communiste français: One consequence of the MDC constant internal Mexican standoff and whatever petty drama that's going through the progressives this week is that the communists come off as the most serious members of the Presidential majority. Say what you will about room-temperature Marxism-Leninism that's barely been updated since the USSR was more than just Russia with some random Central Asian states attached, it's not overly dramatic.

Rallye de gauche: Split between those trying to fight Mélenchon's inevitable takeover of the alliance when he splits with the MDC in 2023, and the ones actively embracing the prospect.

Front Nationale: Will run a joint list with the identitarians, Dupont-Aignan's lot and assorted microfash for the EU election next year, so no longer will we have to choose what kind of democratically dubious white supremacist we will send to join such dignitaries as the Italian Social Movement and the National Democrats in the hallowed halls of Brussels.

Pôle du 20 juin: Still can't decide if they want to sit with the UDF, progressives or go NI, so they're continuing with the "all of the above" option. Not that it matters much, since Valls is about to fuck off to Spain. I would say something about how this is a loss for progressive liberals and other non-UDF centrists, but it's not like they were much use before either.

Nouvelle gauche européenne: Look, Olivier Besancenot didn't expect to keep his seat either, so stop complaining that he haven't really managed to do much with the promise of being the left-opposition to Mélenchon & Co.
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Uhura's Mazda

One gay beer, please
Published by SLP
Tamaki Makaurau
Far-Right Members of the European Parliament from the United Kingdom

It is difficult to suppress a certain amount of mirth at the fate of the Liberal Party in 1979: having sold their support to Labour for a mess of pottage (namely the introduction of the Single Transferable Vote at the newfangled 'European elections', they reaped a paltry four seats due to several factors, including the emboldening of voters to waste their high preferences on frivolous minor parties. One of the less frivolous parties, indeed, equalled the Liberals' haul on a much smaller vote - namely, the National Front. For the next ten years, readers of British newspapers thrilled to hear the exploits of their fascist representatives in Brussels. For devotees of soap-opera drama, it was a halcyon period.

John Tyndall
  • National Front MEP for London North (1979-1980)
  • New National Front MEP for London North (1980-1982)
  • British National Party MEP for London North (1982-1984)
  • British National Party MEP for London North West and Thames Valley (1984-1989)
The central figure of the National Front for the previous decade, the officious Nazi Tyndall was facing party turmoil even as the Front achieved as good a result as it could ever hope to achieve. A month before, the general election had brought Margaret Thatcher to office on a ticket broadly acceptable to many NF supporters, leaving the many expensive candidacies mounted by Tyndall's party looking like white elephants - with the emphasis firmly on 'white'. The elevation of some of Tyndall's rivals to five-year sinecure positions in Europe hastened the end of Tyndall's leadership of the NF, and an attempt to oust the main organiser, Martin Webster, ended up with Tyndall starting his own new racialist party, the New NF, in opposition to the 'gay National Front'.

As the NF's demise continued apace, multiple far-right groupuscules emerged, and by 1982, there was a mood to reunite: hence the BNP, an "SDP of the far right" and a personal plaything of the Chairman. The Tyndallites achieved little more than the re-election of their regimental-tie leader to a redrawn, but still crucially five-member, constituency in 1984, from which platform he attracted headlines for his racist outbursts and spiralled into ever more autocratic behaviour - such as a bizarre command to the rank and file not to contest the 1987 general election at all. Tyndall was defeated in 1989 and lapsed into obscurity.

Anthony Reed Herbert
  • National Front MEP for Midlands East (1979)
  • British Democratic Party MEP for Midlands East (1979-1982)
  • British National Party MEP for Midlands East (1982-1984)
Reed Herbert followed an unusual path to the National Front: he was bullied at school by Salman Rushdie and clearly bore a grudge. In the early 70s, he was a key mediating figure between the Powellite populists and the avowedly fascist Tyndall wing of the Front, and split off in late 1979 in order to start a new, more respectable party, free from the taint of neo-Nazi skinheads and biological racialists. However, the BDP was holed below the waterline almost immediately: a key organising figure in the Party was Ray Hill, an anti-fascist mole, who leaked the membership list and revealed that the supposedly moderate BDP was holding secret vigils on Hitler's birthday. In 1981, members of the BDP were discovered to be attempting to smuggle weapons and radio equipment into the country, which rather put the lie to their branding. Reed Herbert returned to the Tyndallite fold upon the formation of the BNP, apparently having moved beyond his qualms regarding open Fascism.

The BDP achieved some ephemeral success in local government in Leicester, the group was dead by the time Reed Herbert was defeated (pitifully) at the next European elections.

Andrew Fountaine
  • National Front MEP for East Anglia and Cambridgeshire (1979)
  • Constitutional Movement MEP for East Anglia and Cambridgeshire (1979-1982)
  • Nationalist Party MEP for East Anglia and Cambridgeshire (1982-1984)
Similarly to Reed Herbert, Andrew Fountaine was elected in 1979 with the full intention of moving away from the boot-boy image of Tyndall and Webster, and formed the Constitutional Movement in the November of that year, after losing a leadership challenge. Fountaine, who had fought for Franco in the Spanish Civil War, was a founding member of the NF, but had moved away from Tyndall and sought to present a moderate image. However, it was not to be: the Constitutional Movement was cursed with bad luck, its headquarters catching fire in mysterious circumstances and one of its camaigners being murdered. Fountaine swiftly grew tired of faction-fighting both internal and external (sharing a building with the NF head office caused some difficulties) and lost the initiative when Tyndall announced the formation of the BNP. Many of the members switched over at this point, despite the 'Nationalist Party' rebrand. Fountaine rarely appeared in Brussels after 1982, preferring to tend his country estate in Norfolk.

Martin Webster
  • National Front MEP for Midlands West (1979-1983)
  • Our Nation MEP for Midlands West (1983-1984)
The homosexual Martin Webster had been the main organiser (and the only candidate ever to save a deposit) for the National Front in the 1970s and, despite his extracurricular activities, retained more loyalty among the upper echelons than John Tyndall did - ultimately becoming Chairman when Tyndall left for the New NF. In the early 1980s, Webster was the main player in a party increasingly marginalised and radicalised by the existence of more moderate alternatives, such as the BDP, the CM and the Tories. The younger generation, hitherto closely associated with Webster, began to dabble with oddball ideas around Strasserism and continental clerico-fascist theories espoused by people with foreign names. This grouping had the numbers to oust Webster in 1983, and his attempt at a more traditional alternative party failed to attract the people who had been loyal to him in 1979 and 80. Nevertheless, Webster scored a creditable 5% in 1984.

Andrew Brons
  • National Front MEP for Yorkshire North and West (1984-1986)
  • National Front (Flag Group) MEP for Yorkshire North and West (1986-1989)
Most commentators predicted the demise of the far-right in the 1984 Euro elections, save perhaps for the re-election of John Tyndall, but the voters demonstrated that the recognisable name of the National Front was worth a considerable number of votes, and three NF candidates fluked their way into Strasbourg. One, Harrogate-based school-teacher Andrew Brons, was significant at first in his role as the lynch-pin between the fractious alliance in the Front between the old-style racialists and the 'Political Soldier' wing of pallid young men quoting Codreanu, Evola and Tolkien at each other. Brons was Chairman from 1980, but was consistently overshadowed by others (Webster at first), and only came into his own in 1986, when he staged the walkout of the 'Flag Group' from the National Front. This group was rooted in the racialism and Nazism of the 1970s NF, but differed in its promotion of populist Strasserism as a key point of difference from the Tories. Nevertheless, Brons now played second fiddle to other Flag Group personalities, and failed to achieve a merger with the BNP - although he sat in a group with Tyndall from 1987 until his retirement at the end of the term. Harrogate College did not rehire him.

Nick Griffin
  • National Front MEP for London South and Surrey (1984-1986)
  • Official National Front MEP for London South and Surrey (1986-1989)
  • International Third Position MEP for London South and Surrey (1989)
Croydon-based Nick Griffin was the hope of the Political Soldier faction of the National Front in 1984. A close friend of Italian terrorist Roberto Fiore, he devoured Evola, Codreanu and ruralist mysticism. Griffin made special reference to black nationalism and won the support of Colonel Gaddafi, who donated a crate of copies of his book for the 'Official' NF to flog. Of course, the Officials were just as odd from an organisational point of view as they were from an ideological perspective, refusing to accept new members, demanding full dedication to the revolutionary cadre, and refusing to participate in elections. Griffin even had to be persuaded to vote in European Parliament divisions. Since the 1989 schism in the ONF, Griffin has lived on an environmentalist commune in Spain with his fellow Political Soldiers, and has only disturbed the headline-writers once more since then, pooh-poohing the idea that there is any financial tawdriness involved in the funding system for said commune.

Patrick Harrington
  • National Front MEP for London North East and Essex (1984-1986)
  • Official National Front MEP for London North East and Essex (1986-1989)
  • Third Way MEP for London North East and Essex (1989)
Another of the Political Soldiers, Patrick Harrington took the ethnopluralist ideas of the movement to their logical conclusion: in 1989, he gave tacit approval to the IRA and actual approval to the state of Israel, neither of which made him flavour of the month in the far-right ecosystem. Even the majority of the Official NF drew the line at 'Zionism', and split off under Nick Griffin to form the International Third Position, while Harrington and friends transformed their group into Third Way, a party espousing Distributism, Social Credit, environmentalism and co-operatism. Unlike the ITP, Third Way has returned to electoralism as a strategy, but has not seen any success whatsoever. In later years, Third Way has made a point of running candidates from diverse ethnic backgrounds.

The 1989 election saw all far-right candidates defeated, concluding an interesting and distressing period in the UK's political history. Since 1989, all third-party action has been concentrated on the Lib Dems, the Scottish and Welsh nationalists, and especially the Greens, who first broke through in those same European elections. As such, no subsequent British MEP can be seriously considered a Fascist - with the arguable exception of David Icke.

Time Enough

"Enthusiastic Cis Male Partner"
Socialism with Nottinghamshire Face

Chairmen of the Nottinghamshire Congress of Cooperatives and Unions (1980-1992):

1980-1982: Roy Lynk (CPGB)
1982: Ken Coates (CPGB-Solidarity)
1982-1984: Alan Meale (CPGB)
1984-1986: Neil Greatex (CPGB)

1986-1988: Dermot Arthur (Solidarity)
1988-1992: John Peck (CPGB-Solidarity)

1988 def: Ken Clarke (CPGB), Geoffrey Trease (Independent)
1990 def:
Neil Greatex (CPGB-Conservative), Alan Sillitoe (Independent)

Nottinghamshire was probably one of the most prosperous regions in the Federal Cooperative Union of Britain, with a strong Mining Industry and a surprisingly vibrant Night-life Culture Nottinghamshire and the City it was named after were considered the places to be in the FCUB. After the 20 year Chairmanship of Jack Dunnett it was decided that a 2 year tenure-ship was much better for the ‘democratic process’ (inset laugh track).

The appointment of Roy Lynk was uncontroversial, he was a fairly decent leader of the Miner’s Union and was opposed to the increase corruption that was going on. Ken Coates would follow, a self proclaimed Democratic Socialist, Anti-Corruption reformer and member of the controversial Solidarity Trade Union it was inevitable that he would be replaced. Two months into tenure-ship he would find himself under house arrest under charges of fraud as part of a crackdown under the orders of General Secretary Tebbit.

The next four years were the same old corrupt conservatives that had been cosy with Dunnett in the 70s. The so called Dunnett Squad sat over stagnation of the Nottinghamshire economy. This would change when a Nottinghamshire Legend and Radical CPGB member Brian Clough became General Secretary. His attempts to reform the FCUB allowed Solidarity to return. Dermot Arthur had been a secret member of the Union since 1980, alongside being a practicing Catholic and former Transport Administrator. He would win and set about reforming Nottinghamshire’s economy, the Miners Unions would be split off from the National Formation and Modernised, Cooperatives would spring up and emphasis on Art and Culture would occur. Following Dermot came the first election for Chairman.

It was expected that the fairly dull and even-handed Ken Clarke (being Central Office’s favourite) but a surprise campaign from the eccentric John Peck who had Solidarity support and an independent run from Nottinghamshire Author Geoffrey Trease ripped Clarke’s campaign to shreds. John Peck's tenure-ship was about ensuring that Nottinghamshire had a future post Coal, attempts to start creating recycling's schemes, sustainable energy schemes and increasing the amount of public transport that Nottinghamshire had. His leadership would be popular and he won handily against his corrupt predecessor Neil Greatex. Peck's next two years could be seen as him shoring him the defences as the FCUB began to collapse.

In 1992 the FCUB would become the Federal Republic of Britain as a democratic election would replace the Clough Government with the election of the Solidarity Party under the leadership of Bill Morris. From there they would change Britain and by extension, Nottinghamshire...

Mayor of the Nottinghamshire Assembly (1992-2020):

1992-2000: Paddy Tipping (Solidarity)

1992 def: Neil Greatex (CPGB), John Peck (Ecology), Tim Ball (Social Liberals), Ken Coates (Workers Alliance), Alan Sillitoe (Independent Socialist)
1996 def: Fiona Jones (CPGB), John Peck (Ecology), Jonathan Bullock (Democrats), Tim Ball (Social Liberals), Ken Coates (Workers Alliance)

2000-2008: John Balance (Ecology)
2000 def: Vernon Coaker (Solidarity), Fiona Jones (CPGB), Jonathan Bullock (Democrats), Ed Davey (Social Liberals), Alan Simpson (Workers Alliance)
2004 def: Glenis Willmott (Solidarity), Fiona Jones (CPGB), Margot Parker (Democrats), Ed Davey (Social Liberals), Alan Simpson (Workers Alliance)

2008-2012: Ed Davey (Social Liberals)
2008 def: John Balance (Ecology), John Mann (Solidarity), Geoff Hoon (CPGB), Margot Parker (Democrats), Alan Simpson (Workers Alliance)
2012-2020: Lillian Greenwood (Solidarity)
2012 def: Ed Davey (Social Liberals), John Balance (Ecology), Brent Charlesworth (CPGB), Tim Martin (Democrats), Alan Simpson (Workers Alliance)
2016 def: Francesco Lari (Social Liberals), Paris Lees (Ecology-Workers Alliance), Jane Urquhart (CPGB), Tim Martin (Democrats), Anna Soubury (Independent Social Democrat)

2020-: Paris Lees (Greens & Red)
2020 def: Alex Norris (Solidarity), Jason Zadrozny (Democratic Alliance), Nadia Whittome (CPGB), Vicky McClure (Independent)

Charles EP M.

Well-known member
Published by SLP
Invasion of the Quarks (1995)

The Dominator Tarkan has arrived on Earth with a team of Quarks and is sealing off Aberystwyth as his bridgehead. Cut off from support, a team of UN soldiers have to work with the locals to save the day.

Part of the 'Wilderness Years' run of Doctor Who inspired direct-to-videos, IotQ was a production by a group of students at Aberystwyth. The budget is extremely low even by the prevailing standards and the acting is performed by various Drama Soc people, with a tall Australian student playing the Dominator who leads the (two) Quarks. For legal reasons, the (three) soldiers are only visually implied to be UNIT rather than anything said outright. Various rude jokes bump this up to a 15.

Despite all of the obvious flaws, if taken for what it is - a cheap romp by young fans - it can be quite enjoyable and there are a few inspired shots. It rained heavily for part of the 'shoot' and this was sucked into it, with the weather indicated to be part of the Dominator's "forcefield" and the soldiers shown pounded by rain in a desolate road, desperately calling for aid (that part was dubbed on later).

The Quark Rides Out (1996)

A lone Quark remains under guard in Aberystwyth, examined by a core of students - one, Rehana Khan, is part of the survivors from the invasion, and warns not to underestimate the Quark. It duly escapes and starts to pick people off one by one.

A sequel by those of the team who hadn't graduated, with a new group of Drama Soc students. Priti Chandra was the only returning actress, as she was the only a) fan b) still there c) not put off by the last time. It's deliberately scaled down to save money and time, and the Quark starts to act like a more generic 'killer alien'. Several university buildings play 'themselves', which either makes the video more grounded or the kill scenes dafter depending on your POV.

More serious and less fun that IotQ, the flaws are all the more obvious this time (you can see the actor inside the Quark for three seconds due to prop damage). Its big legacy is that in Virgin's The Dying Days, mention is made of "that Quark getting loose" as an embarrassing accident that saw UNIT replace Brigadier Crichton with Brigadier Bambera.

Return of the Quarks! (2003)

The Dominators and Quarks are back, this time offering a secret alliance with the British government. Rehana Khan gathers a group of conspiracy-loving students and busts the plot wide open, forcing the government to back off it.

While the university was faintly embarrassed by the Quark films, the nerds going there thought this was the bees knees and constantly joked about doing another one. This finally happened in 2002/03, hoping to profit from Doctor Who's 40th Anniversary and the DVD market. Just as in the 1990s, the shoot was a bit of a mess but this time everyone involved was a Who fan (which did mean some of the actors, uh, weren't) and this carried it. The script is a on-the-nose War on Terror 'satire', with the government and Dominators planning to 'regime change' the Middle East in its entirety. Chandra, at this point a jobbing actor with TV secondary roles, returned for three days of filming.

The 'satire' landed badly even at the time and production values are variable, but it's committed to a 'so bad it's good' comedy romp and, if you're a bit drunk, mostly pulls it off. The best part is that Khan reacts to the whole thing with weary seriousness, the straight man for the whole affair. (The iffiest part is that everyone is clearly younger than Khan, even the government envoy, making it extra clear you're watching students)